Mental Illness?

luna_kuma · 2020-01-08T05:45:50+00:00

See, this is part of the 10% of this sub I do not agree it. Sure, there are plenty assholes who will be judgey as fuck and might even dump you or take advantage of you; but that is a good thing.

The trash will reveal itself and this saves you previous time.

I would not recommend disclosing it early on in the relationship but when you feel you really have HVM that is right for you then this would be a good test of his character. No need to intentionally hide it. The truth will come out eventually. Why lie to try to keep a LVM at the risk of alienating a HVM?

thewetdog_ · 2020-01-08T12:39:20+00:00

The amount of times my ex accused me of getting “triggered” to deflect cannot be counted.

I agree with other posters; this is inviting gaslighting on a silver platter.

Treat yourself (as in get treatment), grow and get as much of a handle as possible on your issues. A lot of mental illness isn’t psychiatric but rather psychological and you can properly manage with your therapist, yourself and your support system. It’s a life long effort and commitment but worth it.

Men are not your friends, and they can and will use it against you - don’t even think of a fight, think about a custody battle where you former sOuLmAtE and his family are dead set on painting you as an unfit mother because of something like your struggles with anxiety.

Disclose nothing. Men will always, eventually, make you out to be far more dysfunctional than you really are when it suits them.

Remember: men only ever need a molehill.

jalapenopancakes · 2020-01-08T03:06:07+00:00

Yes. Don’t disclose.

They can and will use it against you and use it to invalidate anything you say. You’re basically giving them permission to pull the “but it’s your ANXIETY” card every time you ask him to pull his own weight or knock off a shitty behavior. It’s a super easy way for them to guilt trip and manipulate.

Until he’s shown a lot of commitment AND if he’s directly asked, don’t show your hand. If it’s not affecting you now, no need to disclose. None of his business.

level_up_always · 2020-01-08T02:55:54+00:00

I’d say so because it’s considered a medical condition. If you had diabetes would you feel the need to disclose in the same way? If you’re managing it and taking responsibility it really isn’t anyone else’s business until they’ve earned your trust and even then it’s ok to keep parts to yourself. No need to go into detail they want to know what’s going on and what you’re doing about it. “Yeah, I was feeling down after my last breakup, medication and therapy have really helped me and I make sure I exercise/supplements/auxiliary treatment etc so I stay healthy both physically and mentally” and leave it at that. Once you’re in a ltr things are a little different bc if you’re going through something it’s easier to talk to them about what’s going on but don’t turn him into your therapist the way we tell women not to be a man’s therapist either always practice good boundaries.

Title	Mental Illness?
Author	Eevee36
Upvotes	10
Comments	7
Date	January 8, 2020 2:38 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/elm9le/mental_illness/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/mental-illness.685301 https://theredarchive.com/post/685301

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