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normabelka
[–]jaimecela24 points25 points26 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That reminds me of Sarah Kay's The Type:
If you grow up the type of woman men want to touch, you can let them touch you. Sometimes it is not you they are reaching for, sometimes it is a bottle, a door, a sandwich, a Pulitzer, another woman. But their hands found you first. Do not mistake yourself for a guardian, or a muse, or a promise, or a victim, or a snack. You are a woman, skin and bones, veins and nerves, hair and sweat. You are not made of metaphors, not apologies, not excuses.
If you grow up the type of woman men want to touch, you can let them touch you.
Sometimes it is not you they are reaching for, sometimes it is a bottle, a door, a sandwich, a Pulitzer, another woman.
But their hands found you first.
Do not mistake yourself for a guardian, or a muse, or a promise, or a victim, or a snack.
You are a woman, skin and bones, veins and nerves, hair and sweat. You are not made of metaphors, not apologies, not excuses.
[–]Woman_on_PauseFDS Newbie24 points25 points26 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
And that's the tea. Piping hot and full of truth.
[–]Normalguyyyy5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That’s the Tea sis 💅🏻🧖🏿♀️💃🏿
[–]ceilingkatwatchesusFDS Disciple7 points8 points9 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This. All damn day every damn day. I hate when women think they can change men . I used to be one of women when I was younger and then I realized I only have the energy to change me and the people I have in my life and accept them for who they are. If you can't well then leave.
[+][deleted] 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
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[–]normabelka[S] 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You are not a his therapist
[–]VonDasmarck1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
No. It wouldn’t.
And even you asking this question disgusts me.
[+][deleted] 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]TheLastUBenderFDS Disciple1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Ayup. I think you have to take on the lion's share of responsibility for your own issues whatever they are. You can support someone in helping themselves, but you can't drag them along.
[–]cofogo1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
im sure the man would not want you to change him anyway? why go into a relationship thinking "im gonna change him to be how i want"?
[+][deleted] 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]swillah1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Clearly you have not been someone's partner/maid/personal assistant before.
[–]jetaj-1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
What’s has that got to with supporting one’s partner while he/she advances past childhood neglect? What you’re describing as objectionable behavior is inconsiderateness, but what you’re endorsing is callousness and coldness.
[–]swillah2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
No, My childhood was what you described and much much worse. His was not perfect, but stable and supportive.
I pushed through years of therapy and self improvement while encouraging him to do the same while he sat on his computer neglecting his life (himself, me, his family, what friends he had) and numbing himself continuously each evening.
I stayed physically active and encouraged healthy eating habits while he protested and would reluctantly drag himself to do 15-20 min of exercise once or twice over several months and would cook (delicious) but unhealthy food consistently.
I told him frequently that he was loved and that he held the potential for a rich life if he reached out for it. I let him know that he was handsome every day despite the fact that he never told me I was beautiful.
The rare times he would go out of the house included when I would catch a cold or something, you know, the times I would hope to get cuddles on the couch and comfort.
I tried to teach him the benefits of empathy and compassion, but what was always more important were his opinions and being right. He was also very unsympathetic to the challenges that women face in life usually purporting that we imagine them. He always complained about his female bosses as being “matriarchal” and generally seemed to have a disdain for females that was was pretty well hidden for the first couple of years.
He is a very intelligent man that led me on over 6.5 years to believe that he would grow up and become less selfish.
He would often retreat emotionally and refuse to engage in conversation when I would try to work through these issues with him. He admitted to communicating poorly and did nothing to change it.
Tell me who the cold bitch was?
[–]jetaj1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Thx for the detail - your experience sounds frustrating, enraging and ultimately sad. He was the “bitch”, from what you describe. Your husband sounds a lot like my wife in broad terms. I guess the issues aren’t necessarily gender related though I recognize that women have to suffer fools like this probably more than men. Whenever I see slogan-like posts like that of the OP it compounds my frustration bec I feel like my personal experience is discounted bec I am a male. It’s maddening - why do people choose to live a stunted life when so much more is easily within reach?
[–]fate7950 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Amen
[–]Bilgewat3r0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I think I needed to see this
[–]paradoxical_disaster0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
sounds like a mr struggle huh
[–]Chicken-ramen0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Ya know the whole point of a relationship is to grow with the person right? Not for them just to be your lust you whenever you're down
[–]Phirk0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Goes both ways, but you should support your SO if they need it, but sort yourself out before helping others out.
[+]WotNoKetchup-6 points-5 points-4 points 4 years ago (22 children) | Copy Link
the thing is, you can't fix men because men aren't broken
that is how they are
full of sleazy slimy thoughts who worship their own cocks
and that is all they are
[–]meiyouprisoner-1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Men are shit.
https://icemountainfire.wordpress.com/2014/11/17/men-are-not-broken/
[+][deleted] 4 years ago (17 children) | Copy Link
[–]WotNoKetchup6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago* (16 children) | Copy Link
Women pointing out men's horrific violent tyrannical male history and why it exists
is not women being anti male
no matter how much the cry babies claim it is
and they are not entitled to curl up into little balls and cry male victimhood when women do point out their horrific tyrannical male history and the continual violence their male sex commit against women and girls for their male sport.
Men are not victims here, women and girls are and you need to keep your eye on that ball..
and women take note
it is pointless showing men images of women and girls who been raped and brutalised to expect to get empathy from men
because it is those very images that get men's penises erect in the first place
it is those very images of women and girls who have been raped
that sexually excite men, that gets men all sexually exhilarated
those images do not turn men off, instead they turn men on!
Pornography tells lies about women but tells the absolute truth about men!
Men's entire male history is a hate crime committed against the female human
cos men build up their own self esteem by smashing women and girls down
it's men's oldest male tradition and men are all united in that one common mutual male goal and it is the glue that binds men all together
their desire, their sexual urge to annihilate the female human and her image and her spirit
and that annihilation and obliteration of the female human and her image first occurs in men's own minds, not where it ends!
[+][deleted] 4 years ago (15 children) | Copy Link
[–]WotNoKetchup1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago* (12 children) | Copy Link
Misogyny aka (a hatred for the female human) is not a mistake in a male supremacyst ideology
it's the actual reason for men to be part of it and seen actively involved in it supporting it and all the other men connected to it.
That is true isn't it?
Misogynists do unite together and annihilate the image of the female human just to show to their male peers their allegiance to their male cause and to elevate the significance of their own male image they have to smash down women's in the name of that male cause don't they?
So knowing that, you can now tell me which men are not part of that union in the name of their manhood can't you?
WOMEN LISTEN
Rapists like nothing better than women and girls who aren't interested in them?
That is the truth isn't it?
and it's the core principle of the rapist, he wants to have a conquest under his belt and to feel like a winner, right?
He wants to annihilate his victim and in seeing her pain and hearing her suffering is where he achieves the most sexual exhilaration and satisfaction for himself?
So what do we have here?
TEAM MANHOOD are masturbating and getting off to a video of a crying woman who is being tied down, simultaneously penetrated by three men, spanked, and being called a whore.
Women, men all need something they can take their sexual frustrations out on and why else would you females exist in their man's world if not for that, men have been asking themselves for centuries and none have been able to come up with an alternative answer yet?
but listen up women
Male self esteem is a serious issue for men in their man's world and we women need to do much more to help men with their low self esteem issues
while they are all high fiving each other and smugly laughing in their male bonding sessions
WOMEN LISTEN UP
Rapists like nothing better than women and girls who aren't sexually interested in them!
Rapists are sexist pigs who are all at the same trough pigging out on women's pain and suffering and all are gorging themselves on it.. all laughing with each other and high fiving each other
and
They are sexist pigs celebrating the death of a women, the mutilation of women, the dehumanisation of women because the pigs see women's being brutalised and trashed as nothing more than a glorious sport, nothing more than a sadistic sexual thrill for themselves.. it's a turn on for the rapists, not a turn off.
and if you don't recognise it as anything wrong well why would you question it?.. why would you even acknowledge it as wrong when you are having so much fun at your victims expense?
The Nazi's never thought there was anything wrong in their murdering the Jews and torturing them because the Nazi's saw themselves as really quite decent chaps and murdering the Jews was the only decent thing they could do in their Nazi world, rid it of those they classed as their inferiors and if not rid them completely at least enslave them and brutalise them because it was better to have the Jews obey the Nazi's rather than question their sadistic murderous Nazi authority and have them trying to challenge it?
One should never underestimate the capacity of men to bond together in total male solidarity while the trauma of their female victims are reduced down to background noise!
Men build up their own self esteem by smashing women's down and that is what men's entire world revolves around and is built on..
[+][deleted] 4 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link
[–]meiyouprisoner2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
THEY SURE DO.
/r/nametheproblem
[–]sneakpeekbot2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Here's a sneak peek of /r/nametheproblem using the top posts of all time!
#1: Hundreds of child sex dolls have been seized at Britain's borders before they can be used by paedophiles | 177 comments #2: Woman punched unconscious after telling man who followed her from nightclub: 'Sorry, I'm not interested' | 1 comment #3: Every Woman Fatally Shot in Colorado During the Past Year Killed by a Man | 1 comment
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[–]WotNoKetchup1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago* (6 children) | Copy Link
Normal men don't do what?
Men are infamous for all sitting down together and getting their pop corn out
in male camaraderie and avidly watching their brotherhood shove their cocks down women and girls throats just to see them choke..
and men call it a win, a victory a triumph in the name of their little manhood and for their little brotherhood everywhere
and men tell us.
"ooh hoo hoo hoo, this is what being a man is all about in our man's world, stamping our male authority all over it and putting the boot in to those who aren't born male"
Hard core porn anyone?
"He is masturbating to a video of a crying woman who is being tied down, simultaneously penetrated by three men, spanked, and being called a whore"
He lied when he said he loved her
cos all the while
it was she, he really despised and disdained and trashed
in the name of the thing he calls his manhood and for his precious little brotherhood who are all so cowardly when it comes to the truth they will all distance themselves from it as fast as they can and deny it until they are blue in their face as we can see from you,, denying men attacking women and beating them down and brutalising them are criminal acts men really need locking up for
[–]ImpeachTheDonald1232 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Have you never heard of rape, sexual assault and domestic violence? Is it your game to pretend these atrocities don't exist?
[+][deleted] 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]jonredcorn-2 points-1 points0 points 4 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
.
[–]WotNoKetchup1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Whine more, dude.
[–]saltypretzel90 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Needed to hear that
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That goes for anyone who wants a relationship. Woman, Man, LGBTQ.
[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points0 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
My girlfriend helps me eat healthier, because I wasn’t fed a variety of foods as a kid. Fuck off.
[–]normabelka[S] 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
i guess you’re retarded
your
Yup.
[–]waiflife0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
How are you getting that from a comment saying a thoughtful thing this persons girlfriend does for them? Also using the word retarded as an insult is really lame. Ableist insults in general are lame in most people’s opinion.
[–]Dani_Till_Now-3 points-2 points-1 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Okay but why can’t this be true? I’ve yet to meet someone that doesn’t end up seeming husk way. I don’t meet women who are in perfect relationships. I don’t know where all these mantras come from that really make real life feel so disappointing and sad.
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[–]jaimecela24 points25 points26 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Woman_on_PauseFDS Newbie24 points25 points26 points (1 child) | Copy Link
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