Where is the lie. How do you practice setting boundaries with women who refuse to level up?

Scrazmin_Kae · 2021-02-24T21:31:54+00:00

I had to end the relationship with my best friend because of this. I've been listening to her complain about her trash husband for over 10 years. Throughout the cheating, him leaving her and his kids, the embarrassment, I've been by her side. Then when I needed her after a horrible breakup, NOTHING. I didn't hear from her for over a month. She hit me up after that with no mention of it. That was a deal breaker for me.

TheFinalGirl_21 · 2021-02-25T04:05:11+00:00

Slow fade, honestly. They get the hint. I have girlfriends who have boyfriends of several years who I’ve never met. They know better than to introduce me, because I’ll run them off, because they are underqualified.

Pickmes know better than to bring ridiculousness at your feet when you set the tone.

Davina33 · 2021-02-24T20:53:31+00:00

So true. If they continue, it's best to distance yourself from them or cut them off completely. They can bring you down eventually.

t3ddi · 2021-02-25T02:09:37+00:00

Its so weird. I've been struggling with this so much lately and boom! several posts about this exact dilemma. I was reading "The Gift of Fear" and from there I think I've decided that the line is where denial becomes negligence of protecting one's own safety/safety of dependants. If an abuser can choose to abuse, so then can a victim choose to uplevel once they have caught wind of their own patterns. Especially in a situation where they have supportive FDS friends that tell it straight and keep walking into the flames. I didn't have anyone and I still made a choice to do better. It just got to the point with my one friend where I realized I'd be free therapy/a teacher forever when friendships are about growing and fun.

Title	Where is the lie. How do you practice setting boundaries with women who refuse to level up?
Author	MulticoloredCatMug
Upvotes	52
Comments	8
Date	February 24, 2021 8:49 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/lrn4io/where_is_the_lie_how_do_you_practice_setting/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/where-is-the-lie-how-do-you-practice-setting.750017 https://theredarchive.com/post/750017

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