Woman (F21) worries that her Boyfriend (M23) will never marry her....9 months after having his baby. She feels anxious and is worried that he will never commit. DAILY REMINDER TO TAKE ZERO SHIT FROM MEN! ZERO SHIT, LADIES!

NoThisIs-Patrick · 2020-02-18T22:42:07+00:00

He can have a baby but he can't get married

i DOn'T WanT OUr RELaTIonsHip to CHAnge

SarcasmSlide · 2020-02-18T22:46:32+00:00

he says he already thinks of me as his wife.

Then why aren’t you?

They always say this shit. Men will casually create a whole fucking human being with women, requiring at least 18 years of financial and emotional support (or that’s the hope, anyway), but won’t marry you. You can change your mind about marriage but a kid is kiiiiiind of permanent. Of course, guys like this often change their minds about the children they’ve created, too.

I don’t want to have any more conversations with him about it because I don’t want him to feel like I’m pressuring him.

Jesus fucking KRYST come on. You pushed a human being out of your pussy for this fucking guy who knows how you feel and what you want. Putting on a red nose and big shoes won’t change any of this. You done fucked up.

DallasOMalley · 2020-02-18T23:19:59+00:00

Saying he "doesn't mind talking about" marriage can in certain contexts be a red flag. Why? Because it's something a man might say when a woman keep bringing up a topic he isn't interested in, but doesn't want to offend her by saying so. It's a safe, lukewarm comment that makes it easy to string her along for years. One of my exes said the EXACT SAME THING every time I brought up marriage. Specifically, after I brought it up and then commented that he didn't seem interested in getting married.

I think of it like this: I don't mind discussing beets, but that doesn't mean I ever want to eat them.

hilariouslystated · 2020-02-19T01:37:20+00:00

Situations like this easily avoided: No ring, no baby.

jchrix · 2020-02-18T22:48:20+00:00

I’m a bit conflicted about this one because they’re 21&23. I feel like that’s a bit too young and having a kid is not a reason to get married. I’m 22 and I don’t care how in love I think I am in the next year or two, I’m not committing/getting married to anyone.

Does he have HVM qualities? Does he treat her well and doesn’t have absurd standards/expectations for her? I feel like those are the questions she should ask herself and if she really wants to get married soon, he isn’t the one for her and they should break up.

If he marries her because he feels obligated to, he’ll resent her and it will most likely end up in a divorce.

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