Hi all,

I feel like I can talk on this topic since I am a very experienced person in the long-distance scene.

Some tips:

  1. Do not establish a relationship before meeting.

This should go without saying. Basically, consider him a pen pal before you meet.

  1. Follow FDS rules for texting strategies and make sure to come up with your own boundaries for online communication!

  2. Make him meet you first OR make him pay for you to see him.

Your first initial meeting should be somewhere public and safe. Make sure he sends you enough money for a plane ticket, uber rides, hotel costs, etc. If he is secure in his finances then this should be no problem for him.

  1. The minute he asks for nudes or videos because he is "lonely and horny!" after you left then don't.

Block and delete.

  1. Vet on a video call or facetime.

It is important to gauge a man's interests before meeting him, also if he video calls in his room, you can ask him to show you his room and you will see just how put together he is.

  1. Do not give him your personal address nor telephone number until you meet them in person.

They will usually ask for your address if it is an important holiday, do not give it to them unless you have established a relationship in person first! If they want to send you something, then tell them to give you money instead and you will purchase it for yourself.

  1. Do not move to where he lives, he must move wherever you feel most comfortable.

Many women move to their boyfriends only for them to get kicked out after 2 months because 'things did not work out,' leaving them stranded. Make sure you are close to friends/family or you have your own home so something like that does not happen to you.

  1. Long-Distance =/= In-person relationships.

It requires a lot more communication and commitment. That being said let's say you risk it. If he drops the ball on you after you guys have switched to in-person, then the fact of the matter was, he was never HV.

  1. Make sure you both have an end goal in mind.

Do you plan on being in a relationship with him? Is he worth it after meeting him?

Why long-distance works:

-You still have your own safe space in case anything goes wrong

-Blocking and deleting is a lot easier if you find one thing you do not like in the man

-Communication is a big factor in making long-distance work

-Commitment is strong

-Sex is not required and does not have to be

-You can still have dates

-He can still give you cute care packages

-More emotionally attached

Why long-distance is tricky:

-Online he can seem super sweet, but in person, he could be completely different.

-Putting the risk onto one man if you decide to date him

-Easy to lie and manipulate his character online

Some other useful tips that translate from long-distance to in-person:

-If you have to wonder what he is doing then odds are, you have no trust in him and you should drop him.

-Him introducing you to his friends even though you have not met officially in person is a green flag

LDR's that are successful are very rare to come, this is for the small percent that is needing this advice.

I am currently in a LDR and I'll definitely share my experience in another post.

If you have any questions pertaining to the long-distance scene, I am available in pm.