Do I lawyer up 1st? Or try to talk to her about an uncontested divorce?

dday_throwaway3 · 2021-05-21T14:39:06+00:00

Get an attorney, because divorce is not something you DIY. Even if she agrees to an uncontested divorce, she'll want her own lawyer (an attorney can only represent one party).

Typically a divorce is only uncontested when the woman is getting everything she wants. Split everything 50% (finances and custody).

jimsmythee · 2021-05-21T15:25:15+00:00

Try to talk to her 1 or 2 times about an uncontested divorce. Write down where you are and what you want out of the divorce. Then write down what she wants out of the divorce. If they can match up, that's great.

If they don't, but you're still close, then you can hire a mediator who can mediate things, get an agreement going, sign and submit to the court. Mediation would cost you less than a grand, but it's worth it.

But if "what you want" and "what she wants" are totally different, then get a lawyer and fight it at trial. Expect to pay MINIMUM $6000, even with you keeping costs down.

47omek · 2021-05-21T16:07:20+00:00

If there are minor children, you absolutely need to have a lawyer. With no minor children - assuming you have a backbone and won't just hand her everything - you can DIY it. I've done both.

rennyrenwick · 2021-05-21T17:06:50+00:00

It depends - do you think she will behave equitably, and do you value the relationship going forward? Mediation would be far preferable to lawyers, provided you can come to some agreement and stick with that. If none of that works, burn it all down with lawyers.

Title	Do I lawyer up 1st? Or try to talk to her about an uncontested divorce?
Author	phillygo99
Upvotes	1
Comments	6
Date	May 21, 2021 2:10 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/nhtfuo/do_i_lawyer_up_1st_or_try_to_talk_to_her_about_an/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/do-i-lawyer-up-1st-or-try-to-talk-to-her-about-an.816963 https://theredarchive.com/post/816963

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