So what's the truth about how much alimony will be paid? I know it is different.. I am in California, LA area. Do the counties make a difference? Is it judged based? If I make around 2x my stbxw, but she could make more if she worked more (has a nice flexible WFH schedule where she sets her own hours right now, but could work full time).. would a judge feel like I should pay 2K or more a month to her based on me making about 5K more than her a month? Or will they consistently (regardless of man/woman judge, location in California) follow some rule that indicates if the woman could work more (and is capable of it) and make similar pay, there should be little to no alimony?
I read various posts here.. and just pinpointing the ones in Cali.. it seems like the end result is all over the map. Some guys seem to pay little to nothing.. others pay a shit ton and are left damn near unable to survive themselves. In some of those cases the woman works and still pulls in a big paycheck, because of a judgement. In others, the woman doesn't have a job, and gets very little in alimony and the story of that one (there was one) was that "alimony is meant to help them get back on their feet, not provide a cushy care free living option for years on end".
So I am confused. I would think alimony and child support issues would follow a pretty set in stone rule or two.. basically it's never a life long thing.. it's a short period of x months until the woman is working full time or a couple part time jobs.. and able to survive on her own. Obviously in some areas, minimum wage jobs aren't going to be enough to live on.. and I can see where in those cases if the man is making 10K or more a month.. and has plenty to live on good, and the woman does not, then there is a couple K a month going to the woman to offset her working and able to survive.
Wish there was a clear cut answer because this is one of the reasons I haven't fully embraced divorce yet. I feel like I am going to end up having to pay years of multi K a month, so that she is living on similar pay that I am after I pay her.. which will just entitle her to continue working flexible hours and living good while I work full time and then some so she can skate by.
She has some medical concerns too I guess.. but largely she is able to work and do her job, so I am not sure if that would come in to play allowing her to continue working flexible hours instead of full time. At the very least I would hope it would change how much I actually have to pay.. whether or not she goes back to full time would be up to her, but technically if they doubled her average take home, she would make similar money to me, so I would hope I don't have to pay much if anything.
[–]dday_throwaway3 4 points5 points6 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[+]tanotsurewhattodo122 points [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link
22 years married.. but a friend of mine who went through divorce 2 years ago, married 17, wife didnt work, he made I think he said around 160K a year, in Cali, only pays a little over 1K a month for up to 3 years or until she is able to be back full time to work. I haven't talked to him in a bit over a year so not sure how that turned out, but that is why I am so confused. He was in Cali too. So I see/read/hear some get screwed royally and some barely pay anything. It seems all over the map and my understanding is in California being no fault, everything is 50/50 except alimony and child support, but alimony is based off of income.. and not just what is made right now, but potential of what could be made. My understanding is that if she works part time, and I work full time, then they essentially would double her part time "potential" salary to align it with mine to keep things fair. If her pay is similar to mine (at full time), then there would be little to no alimony. That is what I have gathered so far, but hence my confusion.. it seems all over the map, and I am talking just in California.
[–]sicrm 4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]dday_throwaway3 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[+]modernamericanslave1 points [recovered] (3 children) | Copy Link
You are essentially standing over a landmine. Making double with over 10 years married in CA, especially in LA, expect to pay the maximum and then some. CA does give lifetime alimony, and despite any calculator a judge can order whatever they want, up to and above your income if they feel you can pay it. Don’t believe any attorney that tells you a certain outcome is likely. The judges have incentives to maximize what you pay, whether you can afford it or not. They’ll just bury you with debt until you’re dead.
Best bet is to hope your wife isn’t the kind of pathological individual who would put you through that. And if she is, then prepare ahead of time.
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[–]terfdotcom 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]jimsmythee 1 point2 points3 points (5 children) | Copy Link
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[–]jimsmythee 0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[+]tanotsurewhattodo121 points [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link
I thought you can assess every time there is a change? If I make 200K now, but lost my job, 5 months later finally take a job similar work but for 100K, in no way should I still be expected to pay what I used to.. I couldn't even afford it. Which means I would be in a permanent position of debt that I could never climb out of. That can't be right. I gotta believe he could find new lawyers, etc.. and change this outcome. Honestly I would think a lot of people would just end it all if they basically could never enjoy life again while they worked all the time just to pay the ex to have a great life while they were miserable. Who would want to go on living like that. I assume that is part of the reason they allow adjustments when salaries/income change.
[–]jimsmythee 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link