About to get divorced and I want custody of my daughter.

lemmingsrevenge · 2020-01-02T20:55:10+00:00

Very unlikely. Unless there is some hard evidence of abuse of the child. Courts don't care how you and your soon to be ex interact with each other. They're interested in the best interest of the child, and having both mom and dad in their lives is in their best interest.

general rule of thumb, the more time you want to take from the other parent the more money it will take to get it done. Start focusing on building a stable house for the child with you.

please remember you child loves both of you. You taking her away from the other parent is not only devastating to the child, it illustrates a mindset that you're being self focused and not taking into account your daughters needs.

ThrowawayTheEarth · 2020-01-02T20:47:31+00:00

Why do you want full custody? Is your wife a drug addict, alcoholic, abusive or in any other way unfit to be a parent?

SpearCatcher1 · 2020-01-02T23:45:56+00:00

You are right to get the lawyer. Now you need evidence. I find that the Court takes domestic violence and abuse seriously.

2020-01-03T06:07:40+00:00

It doesn't hurt to ask what your chances are. The weed and drinking- get proof. Record any crazy behavior. Document, document, document. But be prepared for 50/50

ThrowawayTheEarth · 2020-01-02T22:06:05+00:00

If she isnt hiring a lawyer, she must be drunk.

MRSAfulFate · 2020-01-03T03:13:24+00:00

Unless she is willing to give you full custody outside of a court battle you are unlikely to even get primary if she wants it. Just being hot headed and drinking a lot/smoking some weed isn’t going to cut it. The deck is stacked against you already because you are the father. In court it will be a he said she said situation and in this scenario she will tell the court you are a monster regardless of the truth.

I know guys who’s ex’s have multiple DUI’s and lost custody temporarily when they were arrested then got back primary, guys who actually have the kids all the time but can’t get out of child support. It is rough out there. Without arrests and convictions, CPS cases against her concluding abuse, etc, the court is not going to care. Be wary of lawyers too, they have no incentive to do anything but take your money. If you happen to have a family member or friend in family law see if you can buy them dinner or drinks and pick their brain for some candid advice. Divorce sucks, find a stress outlet, think about counseling, take care of yourself.

DivorcedRedditUser · 2020-01-03T18:32:03+00:00

To get full custody, you will have to resort to shitty tactics. Allegations of your ex’s abuse, not only at the kids but at you. Get proof ready... Don’t move out of the house. Big advantage to you, if your ex is willing to move out, leaving you and kiddo in the house. But women feel staying in the house is their ‘right’, so good luck pulling that off... Don’t tell your ex any thing! Don’t mention you are getting a lawyer. She can find out when she signs the final agreement.

Think back over all of the shitty things women have done to make sure they are the custodial... false allegations and all, start borrowing those plans.

If you go all in with dirty tactics (the same ones women use everyday), then maybe you can get custody, maybe.

Really, you could probably get 50/50 for far less money in legal fees... and possibly end up in good relations with your ex. Having a happy ex is worth something, as a pissed of ex can fuck with your life until the kids are 18, or even longer...

If you don’t play dirty, she still might. Get a recorder on you any time you are around her. All she has to do is call the cops one time saying you hit or threatened her, and you end up with a year of supervised visits with your kid, no overnights.

Hard questions in front you. What kind of person are you?

ThrowawayTheEarth · 2020-01-02T23:34:43+00:00

Children need both parents. This is what is best fir the child. If you want full custody, expect to pay at thousands and thousands in legal bills.

You will need to prove that your child is a immediate danger 100% of the time to be granted full custody by the courts.

Is your wife homeless, a meth addict, pedophile or violently abusive to your child? 100% of the time?.

Being an alcoholic and I’ll tempered is not enough. Many people are bad parents and alcoholics. Kids still need both parents.

You will need several child psychologist, forensic accountants, video documentation and police reports spanning the child’s life to prove that she is unfit. Some parents willingly give up custody of their child. Maybe she will not want any contact with her daughter and full custody will be easy. Hire an attorney. Good luck.

Title	About to get divorced and I want custody of my daughter.
Author	ThrowawayTheEarth
Upvotes	8
Comments	17
Date	January 2, 2020 8:36 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/ej3uga/about_to_get_divorced_and_i_want_custody_of_my/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/about-to-get-divorced-and-i-want-custody-of-my.818833 https://theredarchive.com/post/818833

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