I feel awful about being circumcised. What can I do?

Rockbottom503 · 2021-05-24T16:35:00+00:00

I feel like an awful person for saying this but the truth of it is, you can't put it back on so you need to accept it. Put your efforts into sharing your story and trying to rid the world of this barbaric ritual.

LettuceBeGrateful · 2021-05-24T15:24:36+00:00

I'm sorry you're going through this. No human being should have to wrestle with these sorts of feelings.

First of all, definitely let yourself feel what you're feeling. If you express these feelings online, you'll get a lot of comments about male privilege and how you're looking to be oppressed. Your feelings about your body are valid.

There's the circumcisiongrief sub if you want to express your anger. It's a good sub for that, just keep in mind that once you feel like the anger has run its course, staying there might no longer be helpful. You want to process your feelings, not get stuck in them.

Many men find peace through action. I'm not an expert on restoring, but you can always ask the foreskin_restoration sub if you have questions. For me personally, restoration doesn't seem right, but I find peace through standing up for the babies of the future so that they can grow up with the body they're entitled to.

Finally, I got very lucky and found a therapist who pretty much agrees with the intactivist/MRA arguments around circumcision, and she completely objected to the gendered double standards surrounding mutilation. I think I saw something once that about half of men who sought out therapy for these feelings were not satisfied with their therapist's reaction, so ymmv. I found it enormously healing.

Oh, and the final tip: once you're through the "obsessive epiphany" phase that a lot of men go through, make sure to fill your life with things other than circumcision. It's not fair or right what happened to us, but life is too short to let our grief run the whole show.

Good luck. The double standards and lack of support (or even acknowledgement) for men around this issue is insane, but it is possible to navigate these feelings and find a little bit of peace.

03Randomguy · 2021-05-24T14:58:03+00:00

This is an issue the world refuses to see. It should not be legal.
I am restoring my foreskin r/foreskin_restoration which helps me feel better, also I try to raise awareness of this issue so eventually it will be an age of consent thing.

baarelyalive · 2021-05-24T15:05:16+00:00

So, if your brother hadn’t said anything, where would you be?

2021-05-25T02:16:14+00:00

feels like pretty privileged stuff to have to worry about. i am glad that there is nothing worse going on in life , so this is a big issue relatively speaking.

that's good!

im not going to say anything else, because i love everybody. and i appreciate what you are going through, just, scale down concerns, scale up the things you enjoy about your life, meet somewhere in the middle youll be allright

QueenOfMetals · 2021-05-24T17:04:36+00:00

You realize you were given an inheritance, only to learn it has been taken from you, of course you are upset.

Rightfully, justifiably so!

I’m a woman and can not speak to this matter in terms of how to address what has been done.

All I can say is you are entitled to your feelings. All of them. Anger, grief, resentment, anything and everything you are feeling regarding this having been done to you is valid.

Equivalent_Parking_8 · 2021-05-24T15:28:07+00:00

I'm so sorry for you and what you are going through. Let's face the hard facts though, it can't grow back, you can't have it reattached there is no prosthetic. so getting angry etc isn't going to help anything. Sorry to be blunt but sometimes you need to get the hard truth to move on.

There are many men who choose to do it later in life, I've even read that a doctor working with geriatric male patients would advocate everyone doing it due to the amount of very painful infection he has had to deal with due to poor hygiene and bladder control problems. Sexually I am told it is not a big deal, some women prefer it, most don't care, my wife assures me one of her previous partners got plenty of pleasure even though he was cut so there's nothing to worry about there.

You have every right to be cross about it. Perhaps channel your energy to telling your story so that other parents don't do this. I would love to say that a government somewhere would ban it, however there are too many votes in most countries to be won/lost from the religious groups that demand it. So it will never be high on any political groups agenda. Maybe only in Eastern Europe/ Scandinavia where they generally don't care about religious groups, particularly Islamic band Jewish.

MrHupfDohle · 2021-05-24T18:04:35+00:00

I am sad to hear your story. It is unjust a d honestly it would be enough to break with my parents unless it was done cause of a medical condition which is bloody rare.

Difficult to not despise the people who should have protected you, yet mutilated your body. The problem is that society shits on men. Men are never victims, but perpetrators. Men evil, women good. One reason people say men should be cut is cause women would get less cancer. Bloody disgusting! There is a reddit sub for mutilation victims. Ill look it up again. There is tonts of great content. Ill be right back!

Here ya go: r/intactivism

FourFsOfLife · 2021-05-24T19:22:52+00:00

Restore it.

Yes it’s real.

You’ll get ~80% back of what was taken. It takes time but as people like to say, that time will pass whether you do or don’t. Do it.

r/foreskin_restoration

foreskin · 2021-05-24T21:01:40+00:00

that sucks, good luck my friend

Trick_Tackle_8422 · 2021-05-24T19:39:15+00:00

Damn Jews!

PuddleOfMush · 2021-05-24T20:08:40+00:00

I'm going to be 100% real with you:

Being upset over your circumcision isn't going to uncircumcise you. Obsessing over it isn't going to fix anything for you, it will only ever make you feel worse.

What you CAN do is do your best to make sure it doesn't happen to anyone else. If a family member has a baby, educate them. If you have a baby, make sure you don't allow it to happen to them.

Title	I feel awful about being circumcised. What can I do?
Author	Evjh21
Upvotes	37
Comments	37
Date	May 24, 2021 1:21 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/njxu8f/i_feel_awful_about_being_circumcised_what_can_i_do/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/i-feel-awful-about-being-circumcised-what-can-i-do.827645 https://theredarchive.com/post/827645

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