How do I feel like I'm not a weirdo when I walk behind women?

huxepenner · 2019-10-03T22:07:13+00:00

Feminists are doing their best to scare women into thinking every guy who walks behind them is a rapist.

Handle-me-timber · 2019-10-03T22:17:55+00:00

Do you walk with hands in your pockets and head tilted slightly downwards?

JxSparrow7 · 2019-10-03T22:18:44+00:00

If it really bothers you then play on your phone. You don't even need to fully focus.

Though honestly you shouldn't have to do anything. Sounds like feminazi propaganda has gotten to you. You have every right to walk on the fucking road as her.

ZzardozZ · 2019-10-03T21:23:07+00:00

A normal non weirdo would think, the fuck with them, i walk how i need to gwt fron a to b.

GrayAndroid · 2019-10-03T22:19:29+00:00

Similar problem: I'm a student and often walk home after school as many in my area do. When I see somebody walking infront of me I depending on how fast they walk either speed up to get ahead of them or slow down to increase the distance between us.

iainmf · 2019-10-04T00:50:28+00:00

Women are capable of crossing the road or letting you pass, or something else if they are uncomfortable. Their feelings are their responsibility, not yours.

MBV-09-C · 2019-10-04T01:54:52+00:00

You just stop caring. Not trolling, i swear, just worry about where you’re walking to. Most likely thing that happens if you ignore her is she’ll ignore you. If she does pay you any mind, it’ll likely to be rude to you for no reason. Never go out of your way to help someone that would sooner stab your back, than thank you.

Lethn · 2019-10-03T21:37:59+00:00

It could well be what you wear, but at the same time I don't give two shits, then again, I'm definitely not a guy that looks particularly threatening. You shouldn't adapt yourself to other peoples' paranoid fears and if they call the cops on you get a lawyer and sue them out of existence.

OrionTheWolf · 2019-10-03T21:55:35+00:00

I just accept she may feel uncomfortable but that is a choice of hers, I’m not going to rape her, I might cross the road earlier or something but I don’t get much pushback in general anyway. I don’t know how things may be elsewhere but I’m in UK and not in a major city, admittedly if I’m close too anyone I back off or rush ahead

Crazycatgirl16 · 2019-10-03T23:31:21+00:00

While you shouldn't have to do anything, if I were in your shoes I would probably stop, maybe fiddle with my phone so it would allow her to get more ahead. Still, it's sad that you have to worry about that. Feminism is making girls paranoid

sourkid25 · 2019-10-04T00:39:27+00:00

Just go about your business

RoryTate · 2019-10-04T03:10:35+00:00

Being considerate of others is a good trait to have. Like any behaviour though, it can be taken too far, and so it's important to weigh whether the imposition on you is reasonable or not. And that's where any consideration of another person's fear runs into several problems, because fears – by their very nature – are not reasonable or logical. At one extreme, if you were considerate of all fears you would quickly find yourself interacting with no one by shutting yourself away in your house, and perhaps even be forced to kill yourself since there are people that are scared of the fact that you even exist and you might interact with them.

That obviously goes too far...or does it? There are many people who unfortunately think this way.

Well, for those who don't, the argument then is that some impositions like the one in your question are – on the balance – considered to be small. It does you no harm and makes the other person feel better. Except it actually doesn't make the other person feel better. A lack of exposure to the source of a male-induced phobia only increases the fear until just the thought of seeing a man is paralyzing. All phobias like this – where the fear is caused by a common everyday scenario – are actually treated or managed with a process of "exposure" to the source of the fear, and cannot be cured by validating the fear and exacerbating the problem. So by crossing the street, you're really just justifying their phobia and making things worse for them in the long run.

The other issue with the idea of finding a balance and judging if something is a reasonable imposition or not, is that men's suffering is invisible to society. So there is no balancing even being attempted in any of these situations, which is consistent with the fact that there is no logical benefit for coddling the person with the phobia to balance the cost to you. So until men's pain, loss of self-esteem, and stress from being constantly made to walk on eggshells is actually recognized by society, and the process of exposure is recognized as the healthiest and best solution to such phobias, I would not trust any argument that starts and ends with "on the balance it's a small imposition".

Now, to be clear, I don't have the need to walk one foot behind someone and stare over their shoulder, or to follow them around for an hour because I like their shirt. So, yes, there are scenarios/actions that are an unreasonable invasion of a person's private space. Please understand that my position is not that "anything goes". What I am saying is that I have the right and need to be able to walk around and exist as a normal person doing non-intrusive actions like walking in a public place, doing yardwork, reading a book in a park, etc, and not be looked down upon – or made to see myself – as a monster. My physical and mental health and well-being are greatly dependent on exercising this freedom.

NAWALT_VADER · 2019-10-04T16:51:03+00:00

You are allowed to walk through town. You are doing nothing wrong by walking behind another person, even when that other person is a woman. If that scares someone else, it is that person who has a problem that they need to address on their own. You are not responsible for their feelings or their fear. They alone are responsible. If they are so afraid, they should seek a chaperone when they go out, or they should stay home.

I am sorry that you are feeling responsible, but you are not. That is the brainwashing that you have likely experienced since you were a child, telling you that it is your responsibility to make the lives of girls and women more comfortable, at your own expense.

Feminists call it "patriarchy" or "toxic masculinity" if you feel like you need to protect a random woman who hasn't specifically requested it. So don't be part of the "patriarchy", and don't be "toxic". Ignore the frightened women. They are equal to us.

didnotreddit12 · 2019-10-06T06:23:41+00:00

My best guess is to Naruto Run everywhere. That usually keeps the sanity of people looking at me.

EphemeralWitness · 2019-10-03T22:40:44+00:00

Call someone and loudly and intentionally mention that you’re calling so the people in front of you stop assuming you’re a creep.

OriginalGreedy · 2019-10-04T12:21:00+00:00

She is responsible for her own safety , as you are yours. If he has paranoia about you, that's her problem. This is how feminists want you to feel, and they want women to be paranoid. the truth is Everyone should be aware of their surrounding more, but not paranoid. Go about your day and stop worrying. If she is worried about you following her, she will take action to resolve it. its not your problem.

alclarkey · 2019-10-04T19:55:50+00:00

In a big city, where a lot of people live close to each other, you're going to end up walking behind women. The math says that will happen. It's not your place to feel anything about it.

DavidByron2 · 2019-10-03T22:07:41+00:00

Yeah you should stop doing that.

Why assume she's bigoted?

Title	How do I feel like I'm not a weirdo when I walk behind women?
Author	Smasher4291
Upvotes	10
Comments	25
Date	October 3, 2019 9:13 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/dcxbgd/how_do_i_feel_like_im_not_a_weirdo_when_i_walk/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/how-do-i-feel-like-im-not-a-weirdo-when-i-walk.867724 https://theredarchive.com/post/867724

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