Still having hope

cynicalhousewife · 2017-02-24T01:04:28+00:00

I think trying to remember why you broke up every time you miss your ex could be helpful for you. I remember leaving my first serious boyfriend. It was difficult, but reminding myself why it wasn't a good idea for us to remain together helped me get over it pretty quickly. It's easy to reminisce about the good times when you are missing someone, but next time remember the bad, something must have made it not worth holding onto in the long run.

Willow-girl · 2017-02-24T05:10:28+00:00

Time.

tempintheeastbay · 2017-02-24T02:11:02+00:00

I've also found it extremely, especially difficult to get over breakups when maybe you're not the one to initiate, or you initiated but know you would take him back if you could. It prevents you from following my fellow commenter's advice, because fundamentally, on some level, you wish you hadn't broken up.

All I can say is, pining over him and nursing the heartbreak won't make it any more likely that he will come back. And it certainly won't help you find your someone-even-better. I just reminded myself every day that whoever I found my happiness with, I wanted to be the best version of myself for them, which means getting on with life.

soxychamp · 2017-02-24T04:21:23+00:00

it depends on why you broke up. if you think things have changed since then and it's worth trying again, you can reach out and see what happens. at least you will get some closure (you mentioned it wasn't clean). but KNOW when to walk away and move on. (very important.. if you don't this have feeling of certainty and discernment down yet, better work on that first..)

but if you think you broke up for a good reason and it's simply the best way, then just work on yourself and hobbies and life, and let the pain subside on its own. it hurts now, i know, but that's life.

russetrose · 2017-02-27T18:22:14+00:00

Sorry to hear your situation, it was very relatable to me because I recently went through something similar. Honestly, my only advice is to give it time. If you two are still talking, stop. Especially if he was the one who initiated (which it sounds like it was). Check out /r/ExNoContact. Seriously, I know how shattering it can be for your self esteem when this happens, but remember that if you two were supposed to end up together, you would! Concentrate on yourself for now, reflect a bit on what you learned from the relationship and how you can improve yourself for your next one (and there will be a next one!) Hugs xx

Title	Still having hope
Author	bookworm1001
Upvotes	3
Comments	5
Date	February 24, 2017 12:41 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/5vucs8/still_having_hope/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/still-having-hope.87012 https://theredarchive.com/post/87012

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