Should I just accept that I'm a beta?

analonlybitch · 2017-07-15T23:43:34+00:00

No you should not accept it. Put in the work. It'll be a lot of work, but it'll be worth it.

Docbear64 · 2017-07-15T23:44:12+00:00

What made you nervous ? You literally could have sat back and let her suck your dick for 30 minutes. Not busting your balls just curious what mental hurdle you generated for yourself .

spellignerror · 2017-07-15T23:45:44+00:00

No you're not a beta. But with a lot of work, some day you could work up to beta.

TheStumblingWolf · 2017-07-15T23:59:22+00:00

Never ever just accept something. If you're unhappy with something you can change it. It just takes work. So all you need to know is:

Work = improvement

Only a matter of time. Everybody started somewhere. You're no different.

mrHappyPotatoe · 2017-07-16T01:16:36+00:00

Well now u know it. Get you shit together then you also can enjoy sex.

Theres this saying i always follow: woman is relaxation to a warrior and frustruation to a idle mind.

hinowisaybye · 2017-07-16T04:44:22+00:00

Fuck, you guys are awesome. I'll try and get into a therapist. I'll also try it again. And I'm always gonna try and get better. I needed that reality check.

[deleted] · 2017-07-16T00:53:06+00:00

From this post and your comment, your issue is probably social anxiety. There are reliable ways of fixing that, and it'll probably make your life like 100x easier.

AwakenedSovereign · 2017-07-16T02:09:56+00:00

Are you a virgin? Don't take everything so personally. I have fucked plenty of girls. I got this hooker twice over the last month - hb8 at least $500+. Very hot

Couldn't even get hard.

Pull a girl from the club though.. maybe hb5 accounting for drunk goggles.. hard af and busted all over her face

Dunno why. I think maybe it's about the chase or something, like an ego high from conquering pussy. I took it as a sign to chill out and monk mode for a bit

Anyways, don't quit. No one said this would be easy. You'll grow. First step in becoming a better man.. believe that you can.

Don't let anyone tell you different. Lock that goal in your heart and dont let go.. bleed, sweat and cry and dont let go for ten years. After ten years quit haha

mcr00sterdota · 2017-07-16T01:54:23+00:00

Accept you're a beta now, put in work and change then accept you're alpha.

KAMIKAZEOVERCOMMAS · 2017-07-16T01:54:42+00:00

Accept that as of right now, yes you are. Don't delude yourself that you're doing fine because complacency will follow. I fell into that trap. You're in a big ditch right now, but who's to say you can't climb out?

HardKnocksAlum · 2017-07-16T02:14:00+00:00

Nah man. Idk why you thought it'd be easy to just nonchalantly fuck a hooker. Like anything else in life the first time is going to be awkward and uncomfortable. Plus its sex- the most intimate thing you can do. Thats why a lot of escorts go out with their clients first- to build comfort and provide a good experience.

Personally I can't fuck a girl I don't like and have good chemistry with. I've tried to with a few different girls but it's just harder to get aroused and really into sex with a girl I'm fucking just because I can.

We like a challenge- sluts are inherently repulsive to men. Its no surprise you couldn't cum when you just paid a hooker to fuck you.

Lift and take action towards your personal goals. Start a positive feedback loop and rise. Very rarely do people stay the same, they either get better or get worse. Put in the work and grind it out.

rpe2v · 2017-07-16T03:41:42+00:00

You should read No More Mr Nice Guy then When I Say No I Feel Guilty. Sounds like you feel apologetic and guilty about your needs, since you felt the need to perform for a hooker.

This isn't a permanent state. Check out Maslows hierarchy if needs. Alpha is self actualization. You probably still in safety or belonging levels. Anyone can move up, you just have to work on yourself.

Forgot_Pword · 2017-07-16T04:46:41+00:00

I like this guy.

randarrow · 2017-07-16T02:50:05+00:00

You write it like things are absolute.

JackGetsIt · 2017-07-16T02:58:08+00:00

You most likely live a sheltered life. Go out and have shit happen to you. Go work on a crab fishing boat in Alaska. Go clean grain silos in the midwest. Sounds like you have some generalized anxiety. Find a Tyler Durden type friend to push you. Go out and make some mistakes. I've got a post on meditation that might help you as well. Feel free to give me some more background on yourself and I'll see if I can't narrow down more what going on.

Mojorisin5150 · 2017-07-16T03:57:23+00:00

Hey man, I'm I get performance anxiety the first time I'm with a chick. I've had a bunch of girlfriends, but the idea of ONS gives me anxiety for whatever reason. I just like to have sex with someone I'm comfortable with. Maybe you're the same way. Luckily after the one night and I sucked ass they seem to give me another shot and I'm fine, they end up wanting to be by girlfriend. I fall for it because I like having sex with someone I'm comfortable with unfortunately.It doesn't make a lick of sense to me.

Just take my word and don't be so quick to make an LTR with someone your finally comfortable having sex with. It will help your relationship in the long run. The next time I get shot like that I will not being so quick to LTR. I dunno if performance anxiety is beta or not, but it's what happens to me and it's whatever I've figured out that this is how I am and if the girl is worth it she'll look past it and I know we'll have a great sex life.

If you are up to it, maybe try having sex with that chick one more time, you may be less nervous.

numandina · 2017-07-16T04:10:09+00:00

What's your workout routine?

Utterberetacht · 2017-07-16T08:02:05+00:00

How old are you? If you're a male in your 20s, life is supposed to suck. Put in the work now and your efforts will pay off.

Viking_RnP · 2017-07-16T08:45:23+00:00

If you're not turned on by the woman you won't get sexually aroused. Figure out why you were not sexually attracted. Work on that. One day at a time.

Quit with the self deprecation. I know a few guys who didn't like fucking hookers and couldn't get it up or finish. There is a lot more to sex then having a pair of legs spread in front of you. Do some critical thinking and analyze your situation.

Women want you to think it's all your problem when you can't perform sexually. Remember that women won't take responsibility for shit if it incriminates them. That stupid whore you bought thinks she's hot shit and the only way she can cope with her subconscious self hatred is to convince herself you're the one with the problem. She has failed to attract a man. Quite possibly the easiest thing a woman can ever do. Start thinking it's her that has the problem. AWALT. Read the sidebar. Improve yourself. Quit wasting your time and money on hookers. Lastly, for the love of God never take relationship or sex advice from a woman to heart, especially a a fucking hooker.

flatox · 2017-07-16T10:27:18+00:00

Order more hookers until you feel comfortable. As far as your economy allows, of course. And don't get fucking addicted or turn it into a fetish lol.

Kommanderdude · 2017-07-16T12:24:15+00:00

Yes you should just accept that you are a gamma. A beta could have jizzed in a hooker. I recommend self termination in special cases like yours.

Eating-mushrooms · 2017-07-16T16:48:29+00:00

You don't like yourself so why would you settle? You got one go at this life. Are you really so spineless and weak that you'd rather spend your entire life miserable then spend a few years working on yourself to make you a man that gets what he wants and enjoys the life he lives?

5pecial · 2017-07-16T04:31:26+00:00

I didn't cum for my first 10 times or so. I was way too in my head to just let it happen. Find a girl you're comfortable with and it will be different.

Title	Should I just accept that I'm a beta?
Author	hinowisaybye
Upvotes	15
Comments	38
Date	July 15, 2017 11:25 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/6nj25h/should_i_just_accept_that_im_a_beta/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/should-i-just-accept-that-im-a-beta.94178 https://theredarchive.com/post/94178

Comments