Advice on filing

Ok_Tea30 · 2026-01-19T10:24:14+00:00

You’re doing the right thing pulling the plug on the paralegal circus. In SoCal, courts usually don’t love one parent moving kids far away without consent, especially if you’ve been involved. You can ask for a move away restriction and temporary orders right away, that’s how you protect yourself. 50 50 is very realistic if you’re active and consistent. Get a lawyer, file, lock things down, then breathe. Waiting politely rarely beats acting early, sadly.

North-Permit-1021 · 2026-01-18T02:54:42+00:00

Hey man I know the feeling of concerns, i suggest that you prepare yourself first, when i was in your situation I have gone a course online that help me prepare myself on what to do next and also on how to move on after the divorce is final. Do not just go blind imo

OctinoxateAndZinc · 2026-01-18T00:13:59+00:00

I don’t want the moving far away from me (she’s vengeful and knows it’ll kill me) and that’s my biggest fear. Is there a limit of miles I can request so they don’t move far away

You need a custody agreement asap. You DONT need to be divorced or have a decree to get a custody plan (and Child support order).

Getting one on file, without tipping your hand WHY, is a good idea. If CA is anything like my state parents are basically locked in to staying within 25 miles of the other parent. And if one parent wants to move they need permission AND it can impact custody overnights.

Resource here from your state government: https://selfhelp.courts.ca.gov/relocating-moving-away-your-child

Vokenhagen21 · 2026-01-17T23:20:21+00:00

I don't know CA specifically, but there is a general framework for how it goes. When you file the initial petition, a Temporary Domestic Order (or whatever you county calls it) is also entered. This is basically general rules that say you can't move the children out of their schools, bank accounts are frozen, no taking on new debt, very general stuff. If she is vengeful, and she moves the children out of their school district, you must remain calm and collected. You will not see your children for a while, you will be filing emergency motions to get your child back. Even if its an "emergency", these things take time. This is always what you have to remember. Your "requests" are only pertinent to the divorce decree. Document everything, know your ex will do things just to provoke a reaction from you, and follow the process of your jurisdiction.

If she is vengeful, she will be filing a DVRO on you. Do not panic, follow the DVRO to the letter even if you can't contact your children, and wait for your day in court. Look up the silver bullet method on here. You aren't the first, you will not be the last. If you are wanting 5050 custody, document how you are in the children's lives 5050 now. Learn doctors, teachers, daycare, friends names. Be prepared to tell the court exactly what you do in your children's lives now, to show how you can do 5050 custody in the future. If you haven't been doing this, you will be in a hole. Mostly, right now, be there for your children as much as you possibly can.

p71interceptor · 2026-01-17T19:47:09+00:00

Whats been the hold up with your mediators?

Title	Advice on filing
Author	Sure_Beginning_1196
Upvotes	2
Comments	5
Date	January 17, 2026 5:38 AM UTC (6 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1qf4xjm/advice_on_filing/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/advice-on-filing.1571332 https://theredarchive.com/post/1571332

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