It just happened. The first time she said she was 100% sure she wants the divorce. This was while we were in a counseling session today. The look of hatred on her face solidified that she’s telling the truth.

Background I’m 34, she’s 34. 2 kids (11,6). Just moved to New England area from CA. I’m in the military (10 years). I found out a year ago my wife was cheating on me with her boss. She denied it for months and refused to quit her job. So I moved out and we separated for 6 months in 2018. The divorce was almost through In California but then I got a great opportunity to move with work and I thought it could be a last ditch effort to save the marriage plus get out of those California divorce laws. She agreed and we moved to New England last month. A month later and were back.

she also proceeded to tell me how she wanted to move the kids back to Cali this summer and they could start school there since that’s where they would reside after the divorce. She only wants to get back to that job and that guy. It’s not what’s best for the kids. I said emphatically no! I refuse to go back to that expensive state (cost of living, income tax rate) plus those laws are 100% on the woman’s side. She also wants to put herself in a position to get custody because she knows the military owns me for 3 more years and the chances of getting stationed back in CA for me is really rare (for my specific job). The worst part is she’s being hateful because she knows how much I love the Kids. I want to be with them Constantly. There’s no way I could be separated from them for long distance. I mean when would I see them? Two weeks here and there. No fing way! I’m not going to be an absent father.

I’m going to call around tomorrow for an attorney to get a consultation. Surely she isn’t allowed to just drive away with my kids to wherever she wants? What permission does she have to have? The divorce paperwork isn’t even filed in this state. We’ve been trying the self paperwork route but maybe I should play ugly and pay for my own attorney. Btw, we’re still living together and I’m the only one working right now (hence why she wants to go back to her job).

More to follow I’m sure. It seems she has a plan. I guess I need to get strategic about what my rights are. Thanks.