My wife hasn’t worked in 3 years and refuses to get a job. We’ve been to therapy, and I’ve asked her to seek her own therapist and she refuses. Last year, I told her I want a separation, and she just refuses to except the fact that I’m ready to move on. Recently, I’ve asked her to mediate, but she keeps making excuses, and wants to work on our marriage, but I’m done. The last time she worked she made roughly 50k, she is perfectly capable of working, has a college degree, but I think she’s just become comfortable not working. I make around 120k, pay all the bills, and have her on my car and health insurance. We have one child under the age of 18. We’ve been married for over 20 years . I’m worried since she hasn’t worked the courts will force me to maintain her lifestyle, and between alimony and child support, I will end up giving up half of my salary or more. I want to mediate, because it’s cheaper, plus, I think if I file, it will end up being mediated in the court, but at this point I want to move on with my life and am feeling stuck. I also plan to ask for 50/50 custody. Looking for advice on mediation versus filing, and some insight on alimony and child support payments, when one’s spouse refuses to work. I also live in California.

Thank you