Don’t get it

Rare_Psychology_8853 · 2026-02-25T14:51:02+00:00

Something tells me you’re leaving out some context but assuming you’re not, and it’s actually your wife who is the melodramatic attention seeker and not you:

Stop leaving your phone at home.

When she asks about you, tell her what you’re doing and when you expect to return. You don’t owe her hours of interaction, just text her so it’s in writing and she can’t claim that you’re “disappearing.”

De-escalate and diffuse as much as possible. Not because you owe her that but because your kids are watching. Being stubborn about this won’t help you in the divorce.

I am from a hunting family, and leaving the house with nothing but a pint of liquor and some rope is weird even to me. Tell your brother he needs to pack stuff himself when he goes hunting, it’s fine to call for help but he should have the supplies on him if he’s going to be shooting something. What if you’d been unavailable? There are ways to butcher a deer solo when the situation demands.

Gattsama · 2026-02-25T14:47:48+00:00

Let's step way back and think about both your question and your story. Step one. Remember that everything people do they do for a reason, but not necessarily for a logical reason .

Step two understand that women are primarily motivated by emotions and not by logic and reason. This means that if you want to understand her thought process, remove logic and reason and instead think about her feelings, her emotions, and her thought processes instead .

Step three she knows that you are an army vet, and that men commit suicide during divorce proceedings, and that you might be pushed to the brink of doing so. Therefore, she wants to inform the police and take steps to protect you.

She doesn't have to have reasons that make sense to you to do this. And we don't know enough about her to say. She could have genuine concern about you but to just not want to be married to you, she might want to make sure the children don't have to go through that stress, she might want to be the hero in her own story, she might think that you're being selfish and trying to make her look like the bad guy. So if you're dead she drove you to suicide and she'll never hear the end of it from the neighbors. Etc etc

The same is true of the police officers. They've been told they might have a suicidal veteran on their hands. And it sounds like you're in Hawaii, one of the most anti-2A states in the nation, So they think you're suicidal. They got to be prepared for death by cop, you decided to take everybody out in the blaze of glory, etc etc.

Tvelt17 · 2026-02-25T14:45:01+00:00

I understand that your intentions were pure, but you gotta plan better.

Leaving your phone and leaving with liquor and a rope is going to make anyone a little anxious, even if they know you. She knows that you're probably not having the best time with the separation - none of us do - and she was concerned for the safety of the father of her children.

Next time, take your phone and let everyone know what you're doing. Ever see the episodes of Arrested Development about leaving notes? You gotta be responsible about things like that.

Adorable_FecalSpray · 2026-02-25T14:24:45+00:00

Why leave your phone?

Plan accordingly, everything you do going forward will be viewed in some sort of way… That could either hurt you and or benefit her.

dystinct · 2026-02-25T14:15:24+00:00

You really had me at “rope and a pint”.

Title	Don’t get it
Author	850MEGT
Upvotes	3
Comments	6
Date	February 25, 2026 2:09 PM UTC (5 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1ree7pb/dont_get_it/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/dont-get-it.1574217 https://theredarchive.com/post/1574217

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