My wife and I separated a month ago, she is sleeping in the basement. We have 3 kids all under the age of 8. I found a video of her masturbating on her phone and asked her about it. She has been sending pictures and videos to a man she met online about 8ish months ago. We have history, she cheated on me 5 years ago. We got back together and I thought we were in a ok place. Gave her trust that if anything came up that bothered her we would talk about it and not hold it inside. Then I find the video. She has a record of all the things I did that hurt her in our 12 year marriage. Plus she throws around this compatibility word, I know what it means, as if everything has to be perfect for a marriage to be good. Says this guy has made her feel more loved and wanted via msgs than I ever did. I can look and see what I did that didn’t help the situation. But it feels like she has long since checked out and has zero emotion for me. And I am left with my world blown into pieces. I know I have read a lot of posts by women who say they give so many signs before they go. It just feels like when does a man actually see those. Work 6 days a week. 3 kids, exhausted when I get home. And I have to worry about picking up on little signs that my “wife” is unhappy and ready to pull the plug any minute. Makes me so angry. So sad and depressed, even though I try and see all the red flags of why I’d be better off. Feel hollow around my kids and super irritable around them. Does it ever get better? And yes yall will say give it time. Blah. I hate time. Just fucking sucks in the moment. Thanks for letting me rant.