With girlfriend/wife = Sex, fun couple things, problem solving together, family obligations, doing things I wouldn’t do if I were single, reminders that I’m “doing it wrong” - again, unspoken expectations that were never clearly defined leading to her ultimate disappointment and another “L” in the husband column, wondering if the new guy at her work she keeps talking about will sooner than later be our dog’s new “pup pop,” constant possibility of being left high and dry

Alone = Whatever I want when I want, sex, money, weight loss, muscle gain, real time and money for hobbies, sex, volume turned up on TV without complaints, folding the fucking towels the way I like when I like, a full-sized arcade in my basement, and if I failed to mention it - sex

I hated seeing posts like this when she left originally. A lot of dudes say “fuck ‘em! I’m never getting married again!” And I just thought they were sore, bitter losers.

They were right.

Forever Yours Mine,

A Sore, Bitter Loser