The mental toll

dnbndnb · 2025-01-22T01:55:33+00:00

“It’s always darkest before the dawn”.

The goal is to grind you down. You have the choice in how it grinds you. I’ve been under significant stress for long periods a few times in my life. In the end I realized much of that stress becomes self imposed. YOU let it build as a pile. Far better to deal with one issue at a time, control what you can, and don’t let the stuff you can’t control end up controlling you.

Yours is yet another post where I suggest you binge watch this guy below. Think of him as a divorced spiritual advisor.

https://youtube.com/@john-griffin?si=M4K_rK0tnrsBo40X

regertsrus · 2025-01-22T00:20:47+00:00

How many false police and orders of protection have you had served? I am at 7 and its getting worse despite her getting the message from court to cut the lies. I am very happy though. The anxiety and stress went sway completely when i realized

My kids love me and they dont like these strangers (new boyfriend, child lawyer, cps agent, sherriffs and officers).
All the lies eventually backfiered which took 3 years.
The dude in a robe and hammer is not prosecuting me. He wants to get rid of us asap but the lawyers need their cut before he does. ..

This stuff isnt fun but that dont stop you from living it up. Go and let lose a bit. Find your secret sauce to youre new life

fromcradletoglaive · 2025-01-21T23:07:19+00:00

Focus on yourself and the kids, and more specifically this:

I don't know how old your kids are but when they are adults, fully capable of putting the pieces together, what will the verdict be? Were you a good man, despite what was said of you? Did you try your very best when the deck was stacked against you to be made the villain? Were you a good dad, even if you were not their father? Did you become someone worthy of love and respect? Or did you wither I to some bitter shell?

I don't know what you will choose to do, but I know every man here is rooting for you and wants nothing but the best for you. I am willing you to your greatness. The question is, are you prepared to do the same for yourself?

No_Pace2396 · 2025-01-21T20:26:17+00:00

It is. Breaking you is part of the strategy. I can’t tell you what to do, except focus on the kids. Everybody in family court will dismiss you, make you the crazy POS. Just be the good father you are and know the kids will (eventually) see that.

Bluetoes1 · 2025-01-21T19:54:15+00:00

I’m sorry that you have to go through this. Everything piled on like you wrote is very overwhelming. but you need to continue doing what you’re doing. You need to do it for your kids.

This is an awful time for you, and you don’t know when it’s gonna get better but it will get better.

I would suggest you get a therapist, either in person, or online. Just somebody who can give you validation as to the stresses that you’re going through and help you figure out ways to overcome them.

But just like me and a lot of guys that are in this sub, it will be in the past and you will have gotten through it. They will be some dark memories, but you have to do it for your kids and for yourself.

Title	The mental toll
Author	AwayHotel33
Upvotes	11
Comments	5
Date	January 21, 2025 8:25 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1i6e2xk/the_mental_toll/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/the-mental-toll.1541785 https://theredarchive.com/post/1541785

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