Hi all,

Throwaway account to keep prying eyes away. I had my first hearing for temporary orders in my divorce yesterday and it went about as bad as possible. Basically, she got everything she wanted and more.

The judge let her take the stand and she gave a sob story about how hard her life is, she can’t work, and I’m nothing but an abusive alcoholic and terrible father blah blah blah.

The judge absolutely loved it. Ate up every word.

We went over on time, and he asked me what time I wake up in the morning and that was it. I didn’t get to say anything else. Every time my attorney tried to speak he shut him up before he could get a word in.

To back up a little bit, I decided to divorce her two years ago. I was working way more than full time, and she worked part time self employed and took care of our toddler son. The week Covid hit I found out she was working as a prostitute behind my back. She also drinks/smokes weed everyday.

I wish I had left then, but I was worried about her and my son and had nowhere to go as the lockdowns were starting. Here we are two years later and I haven’t been able to save up for an attorney so my family helped me out.

Basically the judge ordered I pay ALL of her expenses, give her everything I have. The child (I get 24hrs a week), the house, everything in it, my car, my salary, cover her lawyers fees, her insurance, phone etc. I even have to do maintenance/cut the grass on the house I’ve been locked out of for months.

Given what happened, I’m just curious…why even try???? What good does all of my hard work and fathering do when the judge won’t even let me explain my side of things????

The only thing she has on me is my work schedule, it is crazy and I work weird hours. It’s shift work. But they made me out to be this horrible bad guy because I work 60hrs a week and they don’t care that she’s a prostitute and smokes weed with our young son around.

I’m just trying to understand how they can take everything and I mean EVERYTHING from me. I’m essentially paying her more than I make in child support, alimony, paying the bills on my old house, cutting the grass there etc, and now she’s trying to take my car so I can’t even get to work.

My attorney tried to bring up her working as a prostitute. The judge said that doesn’t have anything to do with this case. We brought up pictures of her smoking weed with a toddler present and he said she claimed she stopped. He asked that we take a drug/alcohol screening since she’s alleging I drink a liter of alcohol a day and we have evidence she smokes weed. The judge said no, maybe in 45 days we can do a test.

I’m pretty distraught right now, and wondering if anyone has experienced anything similar. I really don’t know what to do moving forward and would like some advice. I know there has to be a way to fight this, and I hope that my hard work in life isn’t for nothing because whatever she says in court is gospel and I don’t get to speak my part.