Did she cheat?

Rhazelle · 2020-07-03T08:49:47+00:00

1) She doesn't feel comfortable being with you because she doesn't see you as a "serious thing". You can already tell she's uncomfortable about the other girls who come by by the way she talks about them. I think she likes you too but doesn't know if she can trust you because you come off as a playa, and women who want to settle down with a life partner stay away from those. That she's still around you even despite this tells me that she Really likes you and Really wants to take you seriously - your attitude is just showing her that she can't.

2) If I knew a guy I was seeing was banging other girls even if we weren't having sex, I wouldn't feel much about having sex with someone else either. Get outta here with your double standarding bullshit. She has just as much right to have sex with other people if she wants to, and especially since you're doing it why would she feel the need to explain herself to you if you have no obligation to explain anything to her either?

3) What does her having slept with this other guy gotta do with anything? Easy way to look at it: you're sleeping with other women CURRENTLY. Should she not respect you because of it? Should she say you're cheating on her? Should she ghost you because you're a slut and not worth her time? Maybe she's doing what you're doing and holding off sex because she wants something long-term with you while with the other person it's easy, no-strings-attached sex.

God there is so much hypocrisy in this it's ridiculous. She slept with ONE guy MONTHS ago. You're sleeping with MULTIPLE women NOW. But yet you treat her like she did something wrong when you're doing the same thing but 100x worse.

My advice: stop it with the double standarding. Stop seeing the other girls and tell her that you like her so much you don't want to see the other girls anymore and want to pursue her exclusively.

If I'm correct, that would totally get her to take you seriously and you'll have her.

Or you can keep playing these random dumb games and she will eventually get sick of this shit and find someone better who she CAN take seriously and shows her that she's the one they want, not a whole bunch of other hussies.

So to answer your question, no she didn't cheat in the same way you're not cheating. And you're definitely repeatedly shooting yourself in the foot with everything you've been doing if you like her.

Edit: I just reread your post and I'm not sure when you say you have "abundance" and are "seeing other girls" if you mean you're having sex with them or not. My point still stands either way though. Even if you're not having sex with all these other women, she still sees you as "not trustworthy" and I'd wager she's worried you're fucking them or want to anyway. Especially if you're purposely playing games trying to make her jealous. You're making her feel like "just" another one of your girls instead of someone special, which is the problem.

Inareskai · 2020-07-03T09:18:57+00:00

I’ve been ghosting her for the past week not replying to her texts and went out with another girl tonight which she saw on my insta story. Thing is I can’t get her out of my head man I love this girl.

The best thing to do if you really like someone and want to make it work is communicate with them. Not make them upset with pictures of you going out with other people and not talk to them.

It's definitely an issue that she slept with a man who is engaged - I'd consider than a big red flag for both of those people.

But the way you're acting is childish. It doesn't sound like you were exclusive but the way you manage your hurt feelings is to hurt her back? That's irrational and not going to help anyone in the long run - including you.

Jekawi · 2020-07-03T08:35:39+00:00

So to check I'm understanding this, are you hooking up with other girls while seeing this girl?

Also the timeline of when you guys started being serious and when she hooked up with the engaged guy is pretty important here. However going by what you've said, it was either very early on when you guys started to see each other or just before. I can't make a judgement without this fact.

Also, each to their own, but why are you guys avoiding sex with each other?

And why if you love this girl so much are you shutting down communication and then trying to make her jealous?

Edit: turns out he's posted this in every subreddit he could think of looking for someone to justify his position

Skin-Successful · 2020-07-03T18:31:11+00:00

So, you're seeing other women, and at the same time communicate to her you want to be a relationship, and now you're butthurt she's fucking someone else and not you, so you're ghosting her, and think she's 'cheating'? Lol. This post is fucking hilarious.

Swordfish1762 · 2020-07-03T11:58:52+00:00

I'm usually an advocate of the guys, but I think you blew it here. If you have feelings for her, why didn't you state that long ago? Unless there is a solid "yes" from both people regarding exclusivity -- you're both fair game to continue seeing and banging other people.

You dropped the ball by not communicating what you want.

And by the way, let me tell you something about "abundance mentality," when you actually have an abundance of options to fall back on -- you don't flaunt it in someone's face. If it's REAL, she will know it. You stated that you tell her about other women and I don't know why you expect her to act any other way than she is acting towards you. She's not going to commit to a guy who will not ask her to commit, and admits that he's out playing-the-field.

Yesm3can · 2020-07-03T17:49:30+00:00

Literal post title: Did she cheat?

We aren’t officially exclusive

Does not compute. And get rid of your pikachu surprise face. You tried to pull dread so much, you fucked your own chance. Next time, use mouth.

Here, I will write it down for you: "I am interested in an exclusive relationship with you, would you like that too?"

I want to be with her as a relationship and don’t view her as just some girl that I just want to sleep with.

Did you ever tell her this instead of telling reddit?

theamazingsime · 2020-07-03T11:05:43+00:00

Well you’re still hooking up with other women while seeing her. She hooked up with a man who has a fiancé. Sounds like you two are made for each other 😂😂😂

bruiser18 · 2020-07-05T08:44:35+00:00

We aren’t officially exclusive

Don’t assume exclusivity she can’t cheat if you aren’t together dumbass

We have not had sex

Lol

There’s so much shit in this post to point out and laugh at but I’m not even going to this is a lost cause mate

nixon993 · 2020-07-03T10:51:10+00:00

Can you two just talk with each other

realmentalcel · 2020-07-03T13:11:33+00:00

She told me it was a few months ago right before coronavirus but then quickly said it was before we met which was almost 7 months ago. I know it was while we were talking that this happened and I feel betrayed by what it was and how it happened.

Have you confronted her about it?

2020-07-07T15:56:23+00:00

Oh boy.

Title	Did she cheat?
Author	il_duce1
Upvotes	0
Comments	16
Date	July 3, 2020 8:21 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/hkfbxo/did_she_cheat/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/did-she-cheat.703298 https://theredarchive.com/post/703298

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