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Sweetbug33
[–]RiasXgremoryXFDS Disciple62 points63 points64 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Block and delete.
Ignore and Ignore.
"Closure" after a bad relationship is the biggest myth man has invented, Men do not care about what you have to say and they are not going to listen. Instead they are actually hoping you'll come back and "try to talk some sense into them" just so they can gaslight you, manipulate the conversation and twist the situation around on you to make you look like the a$$.
[–]mandaclarkaFDS Newbie8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
My ex talked for an hour while I turned the phone off of speaker and set it down and went about my life. If he won't stop calling and blowing my shit up after I dumped his dumb ass then he can talk to himself. He is the only one that cares. Then I decided he never gets the right to speak to me again and my life had been happier EVERY DAY since. Some men just want to take, well they can take from some other idiot.i learned my lesson ...
[–]notreallyhere123456FDS Newbie20 points21 points22 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I also learned that each time you talk to them, you’re are increasing the chances that they will say something awful to you. It took me a year to stop talking to my exbf - they man who completely and entirely broke my heart. And in that year, throughout that co-dependent, dysfunctional, string-along year, he devolved further and further away from the man I loved and thought he was. By the time we stopped talking, he had managed to destroy every good memory and every warm feeling I’ve ever had for him. All I was left with was hurt and a giant heap of anger that, to my horror, I may never sort through entirely. I would rather have just been left with the hurt and some memories.
[–]Sweetbug33FDS Newbie[S] 5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Mine uses it to Hoover me every time and it usually works... at this point I wish he would just discard me. Breaking up with him never works
[–]FionaglenannebfFDS Newbie0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
If he is a narcissist, he may never discard you entirely if he thinks you'll still supply him. I have an ex/old situationship that I only hung out with for 9 months. I ended it, and 19 months later he is still trying to get back with me but has no plans on changing his narcissistic behavior.
[–]leadmemoriesFDS Newbie15 points16 points17 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
For a while I thought I wanted closure with a guy I meant nothing to. I know now that if I had ended up seeing him again, I would’ve been strung along for even longer. Closure came in time and always will. Never gonna hesitate to block & delete ever again.
[–]doadollopofdaisyFDS Newbie15 points16 points17 points 5 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
This definitely goes for friends too. Just had to learn my lesson on this lol.
There was a guy I was really good friends with over quarantine (enjoyed a lot of the same things, real chill and easy convo) but I had to block his number back in July after he was unnecessarily rude to me and wouldn’t apologize. Then on Halloween night, messaged me on tumblr where we started talking and where I forgot to block him saying “happy Halloween🎃I miss you, can we be friends again?”
I immediately said “that doesn’t sound like the apology i deserve.”
But looking back, even though I demanded respect and wasn’t letting him getting away with it, I shouldn’t have even done that with him. He knew I wanted the apology, if he respected me as a person and friend, he would’ve opened with it. I should’ve recognized it and blocked and deleted at that moment. Instead I wasted time trying to give him space to be a decent person. Safe to say, I know better now.
[–]Sweetbug33FDS Newbie[S] 14 points15 points16 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
No response is the best response
[–]PasdepromessesFDS Disciple3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
Block and delete. If you feel like you need closure after that, write an unsent letter. Seriously, this worked wonders for me. You don’t need the other party’s presence to get closure. With NVM or LVM, this is only a risk.
I also sometimes do hypnotherapy and I had one session where I properly said goodbye to my father who passed away last year. I really needed to know if he was okay and there were still things I wanted to tell him. Even though I don’t know if he will hear it, and it was primarily for myself, I have a lot more peace now. I can imagine this is not for everyone, but this can be used for other kinds of closure as well.
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[–]RiasXgremoryXFDS Disciple62 points63 points64 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]mandaclarkaFDS Newbie8 points9 points10 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]notreallyhere123456FDS Newbie20 points21 points22 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]Sweetbug33FDS Newbie[S] 5 points6 points7 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]FionaglenannebfFDS Newbie0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]leadmemoriesFDS Newbie15 points16 points17 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]doadollopofdaisyFDS Newbie15 points16 points17 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Sweetbug33FDS Newbie[S] 14 points15 points16 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]PasdepromessesFDS Disciple3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link