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UpbeatIncubator · 2020-05-19T06:43:09+00:00

The big word here is 'feel'. I'm sure you are wanted and loved and attractive to someone (pretty is completely subjective and looks are only a small component of being a person).

You need to work on your self esteem. I recommend CBT therapy, YT self development videos or a self esteem book which sets you excercises. You need to get out of negative feedback loops with how you feel about yourself. If you're not eating/ sleeping/ exercising properly yet, do that first. you'd be surprised how much of a difference that will make to your mental health and outlook. Take charge of your own happiness, sis. I promise you you could be a supermodel with a celeb boyfriend and still feel like this if you don't get your self esteem in the right place.

I'm not saying it's an easy road, but it can be great if you let yourself love yourself.At the end of the day no one else can do that for you, just yourself. You are in charge of your own happiness, but you got to own it. You got this x

theawkwardalli · 2020-05-19T08:45:05+00:00

I’m going through the same thing as you. These past three years have been really hard on my self-esteem for many reasons. I’m finally starting to try to put an effort into improving myself and my life!

I’m sick of feeling like a prisoner in my body, so yesterday, I started counting my calories and eating healthy meals to get my weight to where I want it. I also convinced my mom to join me so we can hold each other accountable! I’m going to prepare a workout regimen to get my strength back up to where it used to be, too. Also, I’m starting to take better care of my skin and will be getting a new haircut when it is safe and my salon permits it.

I’ve been very introspective and have realized that I have grown to be very jaded/bitter/negative, so I’m going to actively re-frame my thinking to have a more positive outlook. I purchased two books to read that will hopefully inspire me to be a better human being (unfortunately, I can’t start them until I graduate because I’m too busy with university work right now). I also deleted my dating apps, as the constant sexual harassment and lack of good options has been detrimental to my mental health. I’m putting myself first in every respect and when the time is right, I will attract a man deserving of me. I’ve also recognized how withdrawn and unfriendly I’ve become, so I will be working on interpersonal relationships.

To add, I have very few hobbies, so I’ve been researching different activities I’m interested in and I’ve decided I would like to start learning to sew! :) I’m also going to be limiting the time I spend on social media and television.

I think it’s really important to look at the things you don’t like about yourself/about your life and think of the root cause of these issues. We just have to be willing to put in the work to improve ourselves! You can do this :)

It’s never too late to change your life!

xlillinxysx · 2020-05-19T09:23:50+00:00

Find those things within yourself. You only ever have you. Outside validation will always fail you and won't ever nourish you.

shine_flower · 2020-05-19T11:34:28+00:00

Maybe you're just in the wrong crowd! That's why they cant appreciate you. But at the same time if you cant find it outside, find it within you. What are the things that bring you joy?

Alarmed-Tangelo · 2020-05-19T13:01:08+00:00

You need to feel love from within yourself first. If you don’t love yourself, it’s hard to see other people’s love for you.

Try self love meditation.

msromperstomper · 2020-05-19T17:50:31+00:00

I want to say that we see you and we hear you and you have worth. I once read something that really resonated with me: "You have your back better than any lover ever could." Being dependent on others for validation can put you at the mercy of abusers. (Ask me how I know.) You can be soft on the outside, but you need to develop that iron core in the center.

I firmly believe that we raise our self-esteem only through actions. Try to do one thing everyday to make yourself proud.

Title	🥺
Author	TheFireFishie
Upvotes	24
Comments	6
Date	May 19, 2020 3:49 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/gmh3ud/_/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/675792 https://theredarchive.com/post/675792

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It’s never too late to change your life!