Anti-Black? IS HE WORTH MY TIME?

gitepor · 2020-03-24T18:46:33+00:00

If you're happy dating him the way he currently is, sure, but if you expect to change him/make him care about the things you do.... it won't happen.

Hennyyenni · 2020-03-24T19:17:21+00:00

I’m not black I’m Hispanic but also as someone whose grown up in a big city from a low income immigrant family, I wouldn’t be able to date a Hispanic guy who is conservative or right leaning or is “white washed.” Or any guy tbh. That’s a hard pass for me. It seems you guys aren’t compatible because black issues are very important to you and he just doesn’t seem to care. Plus if he is right leaning it’s almost like he’s actively against black issues. There are plenty of good pro Black guys out there, if you feel like he’s not gonna change his views, don’t date him.

Cobmobster21 · 2020-03-24T19:25:05+00:00

If you have to ask “should I give him a chance?”, you probably shouldn’t. It means you’re aware of his shortcomings. However, you’re willing to overlook them because you think you can’t get what you want. Being left leaning is apart of your core values. How do you think major milestones in the relationship will be affected by this dynamic? Are you willing to compromise for those values? It may seem fine now but you will butt heads over the matter sooner or later. Let him go.

mbnv6 · 2020-03-24T19:55:53+00:00

You’re going to be the one stuck educating him if he won’t do it on his own just because some kids hurt his fee fees when he was growing up. Be on the lookout for classist statements said in passing.

level_up_always · 2020-03-24T20:29:25+00:00

It's not your job to teach him. Sure get him 'woke' and he'll have all these realizations and take them to the next girl bc you remind him of his former self aka who he is now. Don't do it sis. Don't be bob the builder it NEVER works.

Pumpkinhead82 · 2020-03-24T21:59:59+00:00

Please please please don’t date a man that you need to educate all the time. I did it for two years and it was exhausting. Our dynamics were similar to you and your guy except our upbringings were flipped opposite of yours. You might be able to overlook the differences now, but they’ll start to disgust you later. Trust me.

2020-03-25T03:48:42+00:00

[deleted]

grimreapersdtr · 2020-03-24T19:36:56+00:00

I think I'd be seriously bugged out by a man of any race somehow insisting that systemic racism ins't a problem in our country.

Although his upbringing might have something to do with this---I'm wondering if he was really sheltered while growing up or something?

miz_nyc · 2020-03-24T22:17:55+00:00

I'm a black woman and I couldn't date a black man who thinks that way. I couldn't even be friends with black people who have said this. I just find it so gross especially in this day and age.

circescircus · 2020-03-25T03:59:42+00:00

I think you should trust your gut instinct. If something feels off about him, don't risk finding out specifically what it is. It's not worth it.

I'm not black but I have an ethnically ambiguous look and have experienced men fetishizing me because I look like an "other", men not taking me seriously because I don't fit into their tribe look. A lot of men are racist and they use the "love is color blind" thing to objectify women, all just to get their dicks wet. They get to be racist, hide it, not get called out on it and get their dicks wet-- what a dream for them.

So the guy you're talking about-- it sounds like he doesn't have as much life experience as you, less experience observing people. People from small towns have less experience observing people. He might be in denial about things. The statement “I’m not black and Christian, I’m just Christian” is a red flag IMO. He sounds extremely naive. When people meet you, the first thing they see is that you're black, or white, or whatever you are. Religion is something they only notice if you're wearing religious clothing, or if you have a giant cross on your neck.

Eat_Pant_b0ss · 2020-03-25T20:32:54+00:00

Yall just dont seem compatible. You should look for someone more left wing and he should find someone more right wing.

DXBrigade · 2020-03-25T23:27:57+00:00

He is black but not really into Identity politics.

As a black woman, I can relate to him.

He is Worth dating, only if you can get pass your political divergence.

Title	Anti-Black? IS HE WORTH MY TIME?
Author	mbnv6
Upvotes	27
Comments	24
Date	March 24, 2020 4:51 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/fo8euj/antiblack_is_he_worth_my_time/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/anti-black-is-he-worth-my-time.679641 https://theredarchive.com/post/679641

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