Hello ladies of FDS! Long time lurker on this subreddit, finally officially joined to ask for some advice. I apologize if this was discussed somewhere else on this page (couldn’t find anything), but does FDS have any thoughts or an official take on the Serial Monogamist?

I’ve had a terrible time dating. Honestly, I’d just about given up; the strange combination of paranoid and dead inside was exhausting, and frankly, depressing. Being alone was sometimes hard, but not nearly as hard being constantly betrayed and disappointed. During the pandemic, I decided to give OLD dating another go, not expecting anything but I live in NYC so I was in total lockdown without much to do.

Anyway, I actually met someone! (FDS guidelines and advice REALLY helped here) I’ve been seeing this guy for about three months now, things are starting to get serious (at a comfortable pace). We’re both in our mid-30s and know the drill at this point. He’s awesome; genuinely sweet guy, total gentleman, handsome (abs and amazing hair), great job, owns his place, good relationship with his family, a lot of talents/hobbies, and a couple of groups of friends he is very close with (those last two are always a significant indicator for me).

Here’s where I’m seeking advice: He’s divorced, has been for almost six years (no kids), and a few months before we met he ended a long term relationship. Neither of these things are a big deal, everyone has lives and events before they meet the next someone. All of that said, it does sound like most, if not all, of his relationships have been serious, long term relationships and I’m not sure what to think about that. Or if I should even think anything of it?

I genuinely don’t know if I’ve just been burned so many times that I’m looking for problems so I’m not blindsided by then later or if this is a legitimate concern. I should be clear that all of these previous relationships have been completely severed, there are no ex’s hanging around. Also, it’s not like he’s never been single for a good stretch of time - he’s takes very good care of himself and his home so it’s not a situation where he’s just hoping from relationship to relationship looking for a substitute mom.

I don’t think there is anything wrong with people who like being in a relationship but what do you ladies think of the serial monogamists? I have this tiny nagging feeling bothering me that there’s a red flag I just can’t see yet. Am I allowing the dating paranoia to worm its way into my head and imagine problems when there aren’t any apparent? Am I so ruined from prior relationships that I can’t even recognize a HVM anymore or is there something I should be concerned about?