Had a date yesterday

AstridRavenGrae · 2019-11-24T14:02:02+00:00

You might not have any qualms about asking first, but wouldn’t you prefer he enthusiastically ask to see you again?

Text him the pleasantries of letting him know you had a great time and let him come and ask you out again. No need to play games, but let yourself be a little detached and get out of your head a little and let it happen organically. No need to push it along

2019-11-24T13:24:43+00:00

He contacted you first, that's good. But if I were you, I wouldn't reach out to arrange the second date. Let him show you he actually wants to see you again and take you out on a good date. If he actually has interest in you and doesn't just want to get into your pants, he will make the effort to plan something.

Personal anecdote: My ex-boyfriend of three years once told me he wouldn't have pursued me any further if I hadn't contacted him. Guess how our relationship was back then? He was low-effort and took me for granted because I allowed him to. Men will stay with pretty much any women as long as it's comfortable for them and they get cared for (let's be realistic, most women tend to do this). Don't make the same mistakes I used to make :)

Ms_Tilly · 2019-11-24T14:12:49+00:00

I'm being very apprehensive this time too. The last guy I was into over the summer kept letting me down until we ghosted each other. It only took a couple chances before I told him to step it up or go away. After his excuse didn't work on me, he stopped reaching out and I'm glad.

I'm letting this new guy take the lead. He's kept it up so far. Texts regularly and actually calls. Set up our first date and has already set up our second. He stopped texting me from 11am-8pm yesterday, so I'm going to let him sit for awhile today if he does reach out. I even went back to the site I met him on and browsed. I will never settle for low effort or play games again.

Liz_Lemondrop · 2019-11-24T13:25:57+00:00

I would wait for him to ask. I know you don't care about asking but let him do the work. Your job is to be charming and fun, his is to work for your attention. Plus he'll appreciate you more if he puts forth effort.

2019-11-24T13:31:27+00:00

Connection happens over time. Don't get overenthusiastic about him after one date. I know it's not easy but enjoy the date and then forget about him until he contacts you again. Out of sight out of mind.

abacadabat · 2019-11-24T13:40:56+00:00

do. not. ask. first.

let him know you had a good time and wait for him to ask. and i usually wait until i've finished a task to reply. no matter how menial the task.

husheveryone · 2019-11-24T13:54:04+00:00

Wait until after 6pm tonight to send your reply, if any, to his message. Less is more. You want to see how he follows up and what effort he puts forth. Go read The Rules by Schneider and Fein. And do something awesome for yourself today.

Title	Had a date yesterday
Author	China_man93
Upvotes	15
Comments	16
Date	November 24, 2019 1:07 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/e0yb7w/had_a_date_yesterday/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/had-a-date-yesterday.687990 https://theredarchive.com/post/687990

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