I'll get right into the topic...

So he's uncomfortable with me going to a club where my ex often goes to, and just clubs in general.

Me and my ex broke it off a year and a half ago. And I while I didn't sleep with him, I did other stuff. And that kind of bothers my boyfriend.

He says he's just uncomfortable with the idea of me going there alone and talking to my ex. Since me and my ex aren't "enemies", but just an unfortunate incompatible couple.

I sort of understand why he'd be worried, since I have a lot of good memories from that club, and have met a lot of people in my life there. But it's not like I'd give him up for my ex just because of some good times I've had...

And it's true I have no bad blood with my ex, but that doesn't mean I want something with him. The two of us didn't work together, and after 9 months, broke it off.

My boyfriend has been insecure since childhood because of how people treated him. And he says he's afraid of losing me.

The reason he thinks this is because he thinks my ex is more attractive than him. Which I already said he isn't, at least not to me.

But it's just hard for him to accept... I know he cares about my safety, and he always makes sure to walk me to my transport (a taxi or public) when I go home. But this is clearly another issue.

I feel guilty about going because I know he will feel bad about me going. And my dilemma is:

  • Not telling him isn't an option, since we agreed on very open communication (which he reciprocates by telling me whenever he goes somewhere and with who, not that I "want" to know but it's nice he's open about it)

  • Going there is tough since I know he'll feel sad

He doesn't manipulate, (like threatening to hurt himself or crying, my girls had such problems, and I'm glad I don't...) he just feels uncomfortable.

And no, he doesn't wanna go with, since he dislikes large crowds and partying in general.

I do have to admit, the last 5 times I went I didn't have a good time (4 times before we were together, and this last time while we were in a relationship). Am I just trying to subconsciously "spark old flames", since I had fun before, but not any longer, or..?