Hey girls,

I've been talking to this guy for a couple of months now, he's 36. We first started talking when he was in a different state with plans to move to my state, which he did a few weeks ago. But I work ~70 hours a week and he lives in a cabin in the woods 45 minutes outside of my city but he works in my city.

We haven't met yet for circumstances (I had some health stuff and working a lot, he was trying to get on his feet). He came to my city kind of on the fly with very little savings and made it clear he would be struggling financially for a while, but he's also alluded to constantly struggling financially prior which is a big red flag for me because he has a full time job so I dont get why he would struggle if not for just immaturity and irresponsible spending. I'm extremely frugal and hate wasting money.

So anyway, he has been offering to make me dinner at his house for our first meeting but I am nervous meeting someone in their home for the first time. Plus it's far and the weather has been really bad and he complains about his commute all the time so idk why he would push me to go out there if it's such a shitty drive. I told him today I could meet up in town after he gets off work, and he said "I'd like that. But I'll warn ya, I'm dead broke. And I get paid on Friday."

So basically I either go to his house in the woods 45 minutes out of town, or pay for dinner. I don't know what to do. I don't want to set myself up to always be the financially responsible one because I've done that in the past and was taken advantage of and I truly believe men don't respect women who immasculate them financially. I don't want to invite him to my house because I don't sleep with men on the first (or second or third...) date and I feel like he would expect that. What should I do?