So, I've been lurking for a bit and recently joined.

There is some amazing advice here, for example, being financially independent. It's wonderful advice. I wish I had had it when I was younger.

So yeah, ladies, vet the men to the 9th degree.

BUT...How come I haven't seen anything here about not relying on a man to protect your physical safety?

Look, we ALL know who the perpetrators of violence against women are . We all know dating violence occurs. We all have read the stories here and other places of men getting handsy during first dates, or worse, as a stranger.

Ladies, younger women, older women...LEARN TO PROTECT YOURSELVES PHYSICALLY. This isn't just about learning self defense; it's about getting past the being too nice to say "NO!" and "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME!" when necessary.

I'm an ex Army MP who taught unarmed combat for a while. I'm also an ex cop who taught Rape Aggression Defense classes. You CAN protect yourselves physically in many ways (not just hand to hand).

Give "The Gift of Fear" and "Protecting the Gift" by Gavin DeBecker a read. Take a self defense class. Carry pepper spray (but learn to use it!). Get and carry a gun if you are proficient with it and the laws in your state allow it.

Just my two cents.