Why do we bother with OLD...

Platipus6 · 2020-10-27T08:29:16+00:00

All his 'forced teaming' is making me puke. This guy is a complete stranger right? There is no "WE"

'Let US see what WE wanna do and WE will figure something out" (he means you, you figure something out and he'll tag along like a princess, cos he's chickenshit)

More enthusiasm for sitting around strategizing than actually taking you on a date!

Anodynic · 2020-10-27T09:13:39+00:00

Yeah I think this is clearly a case of him putting in low/no effort and glad to hear you blocked him but in my personal opinion you come off as a bit too available.

To the "We should do something soon" I'd be like "what do you have planned?"

"Are you free anytime soon to get dinner or a drink or something?" "What exactly are you thinking of?" All the ambiguity but giving him your schedule anyways just shows him he doesn't need to actually plan anything to get your interest. That was your first mistake I think, not demanding anything of him and just casually letting him know you're flexible.

"OK cool Friday may work for me?" Why would he even ask you if he isn't sure. I would be like "figure out your availability then before you ask me."

"I forget you're out..." he did not forget he literally just mentioned it and is trying to be ratty and cry about the distance before even doing anything. "I don't mind coming to you" is so passive, he should be excited to go visit you. The first time I met my partner he drove up for an hour after spending time at his grandma's house to see me. He hasn't even seen you and is trying to negotiate making YOU come to HIM when he made the date idea! So selfish!!

And instead of you saying "I'm glad you're coming to me!" or literally anything suggesting that he put in the effort you reply with YOU DONT MIND DRIVING? GIIIIIIIIRL. NO. And then you're like "Friday DOES work for me" like girl he doesn't even know if Friday works for him why are you planning everything for him. You should mind driving for some low effort dude!

"Ok I won't make you drive" bro you won't 'make' me do anything annd heeeellll to the no do you "want to drive." I'd be like "you're joking right? you ask me on a date with nothing planned, without knowing your own availability and you're already trying to see if I'd be up for driving the whole way to you too? HAHAHA"

Frats are not a positive experience and when you're dating there is no "WE". Girl he literally just finessed you into driving to him, giving up your schedule, admitting you're available and overly interested without any effort from him and also now he's trying to get you to plan this date anyways. I know you recognised the mistakes and blocked him but girl please take better care of yourself and your time. I don't think the other commenter here was trying to have an attitude rather appalled by the conversation because it's like watching someone dig themselves into a hole with every text.

Sometimes if you're not sure with what to say take a second before replying and try to analyze it to see what he's actually saying with his words. Because based on a quick look it just looks like you two planning a date but once you break it down it really shows how all he did was basically put in the bare minimum of effort to manage to convince you in a few short texts to drive to him, plan your date and be free when it's convenient for him and that's upsetting for us to see for you bc it's always upsetting to see dudes take advantage like that blatantly.

ThrowRA745318 · 2020-10-27T07:54:01+00:00

[removed]

Title	Why do we bother with OLD...
Author	NotUrmillenial
Upvotes	0
Comments	22
Date	October 27, 2020 7:51 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/jiwxxz/why_do_we_bother_with_old/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/why-do-we-bother-with-old.325676 https://theredarchive.com/post/325676

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