My ex wife did this. She cheated on me (80k+ salary, bringing home 90% of our total cash) with a dude that works at a grocery store. Joke's on her now when I make more than both of them combined and they're struggling to figure out how they're going to afford rent since she convinced the poor bastard to move in with her.
Self-inflicted at that. Not only did she cheat, but she cheated with a guy that can't hold down a job, doesn't own a car, and has made nothing of himself. She's "dating" the guy now, and they're just enabling each other to be equally useless.
Meanwhile, my career, mental and emotional health, and my relationship with my kid have all flourished. Karma at its finest.
Hey man, I hear you. At no point did I intend that meaning either, so I'm sorry if it came across that way. Trust me, I'm no stranger to tough breaks so I understand how that goes. I hope business is going well for you now.
As far as the guy my ex is with - I know the guy, and can confirm the reason he's in the situation he's in is because he's a lazy shit who can't be bothered to move his ass and do something with himself. I don't particularly care if someone chooses to live their life like that (as long as I'm not paying their welfare check for that reason), but thought it was relevant to OPs post. The karma of the situation is amusing to me as well.
There were two factors regarding alimony in my case:
The length of time we were married only entitled her to ~1 year of alimony in our state
I convinced her that if she sought alimony that I would go after her for full residential custody of our kid and would win
She ended up signing a divorce agreement that was very much in my favor. I'll have to post a story about it sometime, but it was probably the best case scenario of how things could have played out for me.
True, but I much prefer the idea of 0.00001% of every dollar I'm taxed going toward her via welfare than 20% of every paycheck. That's the closest I can get to a win in this fucked system.
I'd much prefer it not being case at all, but we take what we can get these days.
That's so damn accurate. In my ex's case, she couldn't sort herself out. She clearly suffered from postpartum depression that she refused to address despite every attempt of mine to help her and to help her get help. She completely dumped any and all career aspirations, despite my vehement opposition to her dropping out of school and constant encouragement to continue (not to mention that I was doing pretty much everything around the house and taking care of our kid so she could pursue that education). Finally, she quit her job, which was the only successful element of her life at the time, to go and work part time at the same store she met the guy she cheated on me with.
When it all came to light, they (my ex, her mother, sisters, and aunts) tried to spin it exactly as if it was somehow my fault. Exactly like you said: that I didn't give her enough attention, that she needed to be happy, that she was struggling because I didn't help her with her problems. Honestly, those lines were more infuriating than the actual cheating in some ways. Fortunately, I'm the type of person that keeps detailed records of everything and I had the text, email, and Facebook messages to prove the exact opposite of what they were saying. The guys in the family all took my side on the situation as well, and she came out of the whole thing looking like an absolute moron.
Now, she's eating woodchips with her new, useless boyfriend (funny how she found someone just like herself) and I'm prospering in life not being weighed down by mediocrity. Feels good to GYOW.
Good on you for putting your foot down on the house and kicking her to the curb like that. Not many men have the balls to do something like that due to years of simp conditioning.
Good luck to you on the child support situation. Hopefully you get to spend adequate time with your kids as well.
[+][deleted] [recovered] (54 children) | Copy Link
My ex wife did this. She cheated on me (80k+ salary, bringing home 90% of our total cash) with a dude that works at a grocery store. Joke's on her now when I make more than both of them combined and they're struggling to figure out how they're going to afford rent since she convinced the poor bastard to move in with her.
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Self-inflicted at that. Not only did she cheat, but she cheated with a guy that can't hold down a job, doesn't own a car, and has made nothing of himself. She's "dating" the guy now, and they're just enabling each other to be equally useless.
Meanwhile, my career, mental and emotional health, and my relationship with my kid have all flourished. Karma at its finest.
[–]inklingPro19805 points6 points7 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[+][deleted] [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
Hey man, I hear you. At no point did I intend that meaning either, so I'm sorry if it came across that way. Trust me, I'm no stranger to tough breaks so I understand how that goes. I hope business is going well for you now.
As far as the guy my ex is with - I know the guy, and can confirm the reason he's in the situation he's in is because he's a lazy shit who can't be bothered to move his ass and do something with himself. I don't particularly care if someone chooses to live their life like that (as long as I'm not paying their welfare check for that reason), but thought it was relevant to OPs post. The karma of the situation is amusing to me as well.
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No, I was making the 80k at the time.
There were two factors regarding alimony in my case:
The length of time we were married only entitled her to ~1 year of alimony in our state
I convinced her that if she sought alimony that I would go after her for full residential custody of our kid and would win
She ended up signing a divorce agreement that was very much in my favor. I'll have to post a story about it sometime, but it was probably the best case scenario of how things could have played out for me.
[–]earlsinclairisdead 5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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True, but I much prefer the idea of 0.00001% of every dollar I'm taxed going toward her via welfare than 20% of every paycheck. That's the closest I can get to a win in this fucked system.
I'd much prefer it not being case at all, but we take what we can get these days.
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That's so damn accurate. In my ex's case, she couldn't sort herself out. She clearly suffered from postpartum depression that she refused to address despite every attempt of mine to help her and to help her get help. She completely dumped any and all career aspirations, despite my vehement opposition to her dropping out of school and constant encouragement to continue (not to mention that I was doing pretty much everything around the house and taking care of our kid so she could pursue that education). Finally, she quit her job, which was the only successful element of her life at the time, to go and work part time at the same store she met the guy she cheated on me with.
When it all came to light, they (my ex, her mother, sisters, and aunts) tried to spin it exactly as if it was somehow my fault. Exactly like you said: that I didn't give her enough attention, that she needed to be happy, that she was struggling because I didn't help her with her problems. Honestly, those lines were more infuriating than the actual cheating in some ways. Fortunately, I'm the type of person that keeps detailed records of everything and I had the text, email, and Facebook messages to prove the exact opposite of what they were saying. The guys in the family all took my side on the situation as well, and she came out of the whole thing looking like an absolute moron.
Now, she's eating woodchips with her new, useless boyfriend (funny how she found someone just like herself) and I'm prospering in life not being weighed down by mediocrity. Feels good to GYOW.
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Good on you for putting your foot down on the house and kicking her to the curb like that. Not many men have the balls to do something like that due to years of simp conditioning.
Good luck to you on the child support situation. Hopefully you get to spend adequate time with your kids as well.
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And be prepared to pay all the bills when she gets fired from said job
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Well this one actually hits home for me in a different way.
My now ex gf was cheating on her boyfriend before me with me while I was unemployed. Lol
She knows my username so I know she sees this
Hi.
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she'll prob cheat on you too lol.
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Nothing says trailer hag quite like tattooed bingo wings on the back of a harley.
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