TL;DR broke up with my unicorn to pursue self-betterment.
Broke up with my girlfriend a few hours ago. We'd been dating for almost a year, and this was our first real fight. I'm a bit of a conspriacy nut, and I guess she got sick of it. Harsh things were said, and made harsher since they were over text, rather than in person. We took a few days to think about our relationship and what we had said, before meeting up today.
I like this girl. She seemed like my unicorn in some ways. But even before showing up to talk, I kept in mind that I didn't need her, and that I could survive either way. I would have liked to continue the relationship, but I didn't need it.
We talked, admitted where we had both been at fault, and came to the conclusion that it was best if we went our seperate ways.
I've always struggled with emotions. Knowing how you feel about someone is hard when you killed your emotions early to survive your teenage years. I know she looked rather sad about this relationship ending, but I'm honestly drawing a blank when it comes to the breakup. I don't really feel anything. And maybe that's a good thing.
I think now that I'm free, I can start focusing on improving myself more. I can make moves without wondering how they might affect her. I won't have to worry about her dislike who I game with or what I want to watch either. I'm sure at some point I'll miss her. It was nice to have someone to hold on cold nights. But ultimately, I feel I will be better off now that I am free.
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