Whether or not this preface is relevant, I feel the need to share it: I’m a 26 year old INTJ and the both of them were ENFP, 24 years old. (MBTI stuff for those who have researched it.)

I mainly entered these relationships to enjoy my summer and have fun. They both had nothing going for them career wise, spent their early 20’s just partying, afraid to step into the world. Well I’ve got everything I need in my life; hustled for over a decade to build my business and it all paid off.

In the first month they were infatuated with me. All this talk about “I want your kids, I can see a clear future with you, I’ll cook for you so when you get home from work you can eat and then we’ll bang.” Made me feel like a king. Then suddenly around month two things start to change once I try to help them get their shit together with them. They tell me what their goals in life are and I immediately drop everything to help them. Now I know you’re not supposed to save your partner, as it never works out, so for the second gf I just gave advice rather than helicopter.

The both of them just end up doing the same shit still. Going to get hammered with their friends, wild nights out, no control over their schedule which of course affects my life when we make weekend plans and I’m sitting there on a Friday night at 12am wondering why I haven’t heard back from them for 5 hours and we’re supposed to meet at 9am.

Then as I try to slowly coerce them into getting their shit together and explain how they’re messing with our relationship trust, I notice a gradual build of resentment. They start cutting up, saying mean shit, disrespecting you for no reason... The first time around this resulted in an explosion of emotions between us after weeks of issues. Ended extremely bad and fucked with my business capabilities for weeks. They both promised they would change and do better for me. First one ended up monkey branching me.

Second time around I cut it off before it could even get started. I knew what was coming. My life is too disciplined to let someone else fuck up around me, so there’s no way for me to just let them do their thing. I can’t have hiccups in my plans.

Obviously I have shit taste in women, but it’s just so sad that the first month is so pure and happy and all of a sudden they’re like, “fuck that I’m still gonna do me.” I’m happy I’m no longer with either of them as the emotional anxiety was getting unbearable. Insane pressure in my chest, starting to affect my work life, no appetite or drive to workout.

I’m good at being a partner and I like the exclusivity, but it feels like a job more than a partnership. All the meanwhile they can tell you everything about demanding respect for women, how they want to be treated, etc. They haven't got a clue how to handle a man's emotions, and that's the loneliest part of it all.

I’m just a week out now with getting over the second one, so I needed somewhere to vent and place my thoughts with feedback.

Thanks for reading.