My wife has a habit of bringing up an idea for decision by me, and once I've made that decision, hamstering around to asking for the opposite of what she asked for originally. For example, last night she asked if I would take baby duty if the baby woke up in the middle of the night, since she had to work and I didn't. I thought about, and agreed. Immediately she started with the hamster: "Well, maybe I'll be more tired tomorrow night, so I should save my off night for then, and anyway blah bah blah etc, so how about I take baby duty tonight and you take it tomorrow night."
I have only recently begun to see this as a shit test, but it's an insidious one. Did I already lose by agreeing to the first reasonable request? Or is that a pass, but changing my answer is a lose? Or is telling her I'm out and she needs to handle it the right way? Etc. Last night my response was that we would stick with the first plan we negotiated, and that in the future she needs to fully consider what she actually wants before making requests of me, because I will hold her to what I decide. On the surface that feels right, but I can't help but feel like it was sloppy and unsatisfying.
Thoughts?