This post will describe how the relationship with my wife is structured. I'm late thirties, he's 3, she's around 25 and married for 4 years.
Simply put, by removing most of the "administrative" talk from our in-person conversations, our time together is always sexually charged. From what I call "Do we have milk?" conversations all the way to career moves and picking our son's schools, it's almost all conducted electronically or by other means such as writing. Just not in person. When you're with your girl and don't have any banal domestic bullshit to discuss, what's left? Fucking. And the arts.
Years ago, I decided to move out of sight anything that detracted from romance. I didn't explain this, I just structured the relationship so the conversations that would normally mute attraction happened over the phone, and later over email or other networked means. While only marginally successful with some girls, with others the difference was remarkable. I didn't think about what might happen. Hell, I didn't know if it would change anything at all, let alone lead to this hyper-sexual version.
Other factors in the success of our relationship are a couple of my natural tendencies that help sustain attraction. If familiarity breeds contempt then I'm covered in two places. First, I'm scarce. Business and personal life take up most of my time. Second, I'm mysterious. I'm not really, but I am to her. I'm selective in who I speak to and what about. I am usually a man of few words. With women, when they're hooked I immediately pull back on the sharing. They know me enough to want me, and that's good enough. Plus, stories lose a little life every time they're told.
So the woman is still learning significant things about me. Just a few months ago she found out that I am a classically trained musician. That still tickles her. She doesn't like the fact that part of me is a stranger to her, but it's exciting at the same time.
I'm being brief. I could talk for hours about this but I don't know which parts to cover. I'll stick around in case there are questions.
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