About a year ago... I was a little frustrated with my sex life... but hey, that was pretty much par for the course. I had pretty much gotten used to it... sometimes I would beg for sex... dark times... I'm not particularly proud of myself.

Then, out of the blue, a friend asked me if we wanted to come on a trip with him and his girlfriend. And then he made the joke that started it all, "On Sunday it's my birthday, we could even do wife swap night!"

I told my wife about the little comment he made and I could tell that it sparked her interest. I wasn't bothered by it, cause I mean fuck... the fantasy of threesomes and foursomes... it can make you ignore a lot of things, at least it did with me.

Nothing ended up happening with my friend and his girlfriend, he was just kidding after all... but it got the wheels turning in my head. And in the wife's too. For the week we were on vacation with them, and the weeks after, my wife and I were fucking like jackrabbits... more sex in 2 weeks than in the 4 months prior.

After we got back... within a month or so we joined a swinger website and went out for drinks with our first couple, and a few nights later... back to their place for some sexy times. It started out slow, and we were incredibly nervous... but once things started going, it really took off. At one point I remember looking down while both ladies were giving me a BJ... and I looked at the other guy with a look that conveyed pleasure, shock, and almost disbelief... and he just gave me a thumbs up and said "I know! right?!"

So from there, things were going pretty good... I honestly had figured I/we had been missing out all of these years. We could meet with other couples, have some drinks / fool around (with protection... always) and our sex life was still like awesome like never before.

That is... until we met a particular couple. This guy was very much alpha, and he swept her off of her feet. And to make matters worse, we decided it would be cool to try separate room swap (meaning exactly what it sounds... I fuck his wife, and he... mine) Now don't get me wrong... I had fun, a lot of fun. But it was more than just fun for her... and it was after that meet... things went downhill.

The wife didn't really want to meet with other couples anymore, and was starting to withdraw from me... the withdrawal was hard and frustrating to wrap my head around. Because I knew without a doubt if that guy came for a visit... she would be all fucking over him.

Time passes, we meet with them a few more times... and after the last time... both myself, and the other wife have had enough of our spouse's bullshit. Our relationship was going downhill (and I'm pretty sure the other couple's relationship was shit long before we came along)

We told them to break of contact and that would be the end of it, but it wasn't so simple. They would just get more secretive about their communication (but not secretive enough that either myself or the other wife wouldn't be able to find the evidence).

I pushed my wife into relationship therapy, and that seemed to only drive her away further. We separated for a bit... and that just started to cement things in her mind. At one point after she had a solo therapy session I called her to ask how it went, her response: "Good, just not good for you... I really don't see us working out"

Rather than get angry... I crumpled into a hurt sobbing fool... begging for her to come home to talk. It wasn't until I threatened to wake our son up and put him in the car to drive to her that she folded and came home. By the time she got home... I was having a full fledged panic attack.

She felt pretty bad, best as I can tell she doesn't enjoy hurting me. Then she dropped the "I love you, but i'm not in love with you". The next day... I started heavy into the good beta stuff (which unknown to me was chapter 19 of MMSLP), and after about 2 weeks our relationship outlook started to improve. Our sex life didn't... but the relationship started to come back from the brink.

Then about 2 weeks ago I discovered TRP... and this sub. So far i've only read about 3/4 of the way through the MMSLP but I am amazed at how much I relate to this book... and how she seems to positively responds to me being more alpha. I literally went "Holy fucking shit" when I read the heading of chapter 1.9 "I love you but i'm not in love with you..."

So now i'm almost done the book... and i'm looking back on the last year... and I feel like it was entirely my fault. The other guy was a profession of higher status, makes more money, is stronger, taller... meanwhile I was lacking in every alpha skill... and even some of the beta skills.

Anywho... this isn't really a question, just more of a public service announcement. If you want to invite others into the bedroom, make sure your own alpha attributes are ready for that, otherwise it could end poorly.

TLDNR: I had zero alpha attributes, and about a year ago I convinced my wife to try swinging. She met an alpha, and I almost lost everything