Am I in the wrong??

a-man-from-earth · 2017-10-13T01:17:22+00:00

Tell your mum to teach her daughters not to use violence. What happened to you was domestic abuse, and that is not okay.

Tedesche · 2017-10-13T03:12:00+00:00

No, you're absolutely not in the wrong, your sisters and your mother are.

However, you don't really have much power to change things in this situation. I would try to talk to your mom and get her to agree to intervene the next time you call for her help. If she won't agree to do so...well, I don't know what to tell you. Unless your dad is in the picture and can help, you don't have many options. Other people are suggesting you call the police, but the truth of the matter is that if you do, and you tell them your mom is letting your sisters physically assault you, that could well open up a CPS (child protective services) case for your family, which might involve removing you and your sisters from the home temporarily. In other words, taking legal action has the potential to make the situation blow up into something much more serious for everyone involved, and is not something I'd suggest to you do unless you really can't stand what's going on.

SJW_Skeptic · 2017-10-13T14:40:50+00:00

Tell your mother the following. I don’t want to discuss this while we are all upset can we schedule a time to speak privately about this. I think you have treated me unfairly. Then in 2 days ask do you have time to speak? If she says no then ask if there is a time when she will be willing to speak to you like an adult?

When you agree on a time and place avoid emotion and blame. But focus on the issues. Ask questions and wait for answers. 1) Why was your story dis Issey without consideration 2) Why is it acceptable for your siblings to physically attack you? 3) What level of physical damage is it acceptable for you to tolerate? 4) What do you think my sisters learn when they suffer no penalty for family violence?

if your mother is not willing to answer. Then your response should be. At least I know where I stand. Please supply a rape whistle and come when I blow it if you do not I will call the police to report that I am a victim of family violence and my mother won’t allow me to defend myself or do anything to protect me.

PillTheRed · 2017-10-13T02:45:32+00:00

I'd call the cops next time and charge them with assault if your mom isn't going to do anything. That is, of your legit getting hurt and scared. Video record it as well, that is crucial.

shonmao · 2017-10-13T05:54:07+00:00

(A)lways (B)e (R)ecording

TibsKirk · 2017-10-13T03:28:11+00:00

Teach your mother that violence is violence. It's not somehow cute when it happens to men. Perhaps show her a few of those social experiment videos on YT where everybody laughs as women assault men, but nobody tolerates the reverse.

WildHuntsman · 2017-10-13T01:06:55+00:00

I feel you. My sister is younger and smaller than me, yet she would regularly abuse my mother and I.

She would find me and begin viciously beating me (such as with a wooden toy of mine) for minor infractions (I.e. She suspected that I ate a cracker meant for her).

She was rarely violent around our father, and when she was, he would usually just raise his voice until things died down.

My mother would often give up, ignoring my cries for help, and then blaming us for her lack of parenting skills.

My sister only realized after entering puberty that she could pull the "innocent female" card. She would cry in public when she wasn't getting her way like a child, draw attention, make herself seem in distress, make whoever upset her look bad in the public eye.

She has harmed family members both physically (pushing someone down a stairway) and emotionally (pitching a fits that would reduce my mother to tears and then keep going).

My mother and father are terrible parents, but my sister is an obvious cancer that should have been removed some time ago.

In short, through my own family life, I can attest that you aren't alone.

2017-10-13T06:27:45+00:00

Obviously you are in a slanted house hold. If you absolutely cant restrain them from hitting you next time and yelling for your mom doesnt do shit then scream as loud as you can or deepen your voice and yell. Might stop them in their tracks. Sorry this is happening to you.

UsedTeeth · 2017-10-13T06:50:07+00:00

your family is being insanely shitty to you. you arent being a pussy. you were wronged and venting is important. im hoping for you that as the adrenaline fades apologies or at least ashamed silence will follow. if not... well:

keep in mind women are told alllll the time not to be out too late or go to sketchy neighborhoods and to be afraid of men. and then we get all this shit where just sometimes theres just a gut reaction to be scared of men. we occasionally just get it and have to shake it off.

so theres a fair chance they just got that emotion. as irrational as even they might know but cant shake. maybe even the "dear god did i raise a monster" Flash of thought. my PeRsonal advice: play meek, 'quiet giant, horrified by his own strength'. distance yourself from the Scary Men Who Yell Back and Attack ://

people calm Themselves down if they can speak their mind/rant. no matter how right you are, for some reason if you just shut up/dissociate wildly, it kinda works. give 'em quiet -i know that was bad, im sorry, is-she-okay-did-she-hit-her-head/fake genuine concerns, whatever. hopefully that way itll blow itself over quickly. you cant win against emotion even if they later realize theyre wrong.

just taking it hurts too so take a bubble bath, set some shit on fire, vent, accept a bad few days and itll be over soon. youre the good one here & im sorry. good luck <3 -(but thats just me)

ThePigmanAgain · 2017-10-13T00:11:11+00:00

Your mom and sisters are pieces of shit. Wait till you are 18 and then move out. Wait another forty years, and put your mom in the kind of nursing home you see on 60 Minutes. Either that or put massive doses of laxative in their morning coffee, then laugh hysterically as they beat one another senseless trying to see who gets to use the toilet first!

zulu127 · 2017-10-13T10:21:13+00:00

They have their own bathroom!? Do you have your own? Is it down in the basement with mildew growing in the corners, you know, something suitable for a male?

You were justified in doing what you did, no one should be expected to suffer abuse.

extrayyc1 · 2017-10-13T14:38:42+00:00

am the oldest I have 4 sisters. This was a common scene in my house growing up. Having no father in the house there was no break from the estrogen or the abuse i suffered at their hands. It took most of my twenties to finally get through the women issues I had and start making successful relationships. Unfortunately your mother will never see it on your side Your Man. Then when you can be rid of them. deal with yourself and issues that have come up because of things in situations like this.

SpikedGIraffe · 2017-10-13T18:20:37+00:00

I would tell mom that you will treat your sisters the EXACT same way they treat you.

That is what my Mom told me, don't hit first, but you can hit back. My brother and I only ever yelled at each other, never once did we get into a physical confrontation.

EDIT: I presume you have a Cell Phone.

ABR - Always Be Recording Record whatever you can.

Title	Am I in the wrong??
Author	relishinginonions
Upvotes	25
Comments	15
Date	October 12, 2017 10:24 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/760iz6/am_i_in_the_wrong/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/am-i-in-the-wrong.913048 https://theredarchive.com/post/913048

Comments