Did I mess up

unfknblvbe · 2021-12-24T03:59:42+00:00

Fuck this girl but also dont be chump you now she fucked you over stop doing things for her

mikesteane · 2021-12-24T04:13:53+00:00

" i took your girl"

"thanks, can you take the rest of my garbage out as well"

Move on, write it off to experience and learn, at the very least, the following:

Recognise red flags and act on them.
Don't date long distance
Don't pay anybody's way unless they are doing something to justify it, like raising your children.
When she asked you to take your name off the lease, you should have told her to go.
Set boundaries and enforce them.

yes, you stuffed up, but it has not destroyed your life, the way some things would have done. Just move on. Life will not work out well for her or the other guy, but that is not your concern. Whether it will for you is entirely up to the choices you make.

ijustdontcare74 · 2021-12-24T04:49:20+00:00

Yes you fucked up badly.

At the 1st sign of disloyalty you should have ended it with her. What sort of honourable person gives an ultimatum to stop talking to their partner over a 3rd party who they might be cheating with? That was your sign that she was going to use you.

I know it's painful and expensive, but use this as a life lesson and try not to be so gullible next time. Make it a rule that you won't move in with another person (excluding non intimate room mates situation) for a minimum period of time once dating, say 3 yrs. This will give you time to sniff out those red flags without landing yourself in this type of situation.

The only upside of this is that your name is no longer on the lease, so you can walk away without financial penalty. What you need to do is block and ghost completely and remember when the relationship with this chad breaks down (which it will...bank on it) NEVER take her back, let her live with the consequences of her own actions.

Wolffsrain · 2021-12-24T10:47:22+00:00

"I moved my ex narcissist to my hometown"... I stopped reading after the opener. You never move someone in or co-habitate until you really know them. So yeah you messed up. Live and learn.

DaTechNegro · 2021-12-24T05:05:45+00:00

Bro you have to just hold the L and move on. Learn and grow from it.

ShiZniT3 · 2021-12-24T06:19:53+00:00

she disrespected you, bargained with you because you were weak and youre surprised what she did? you got played, plain and simple. you signed away your lease rights...

if you have proof that anything in the apartment is yours, you can report that to the police and she either gives you back your stuff or they escort you in to retrieve your property, but they probably wont even bother since you signed away your lease.

goinsouth85 · 2021-12-24T17:25:43+00:00

Yeah you messed up. But look at the bright side - you didn't marry her or have kids with her. You're still young so you'll recover. Consider this one of life's lessons.

If it makes you feel better - I guarantee in year or two, that chump she's with now will be exactly where you are, when she pulls the same shit again.

Nokturnal37F · 2021-12-25T02:04:49+00:00

So a little rule that I've learned to live by... Ask yourself the question, "If this situation was happening with someone I am not sleeping with (or have slept with) would it still be okay?". Use this against yourself also. If in some situation you are angry about something or something like that, ask the question. Imo, it's a question that both protects the person, as well as protecting them from themselves.

xTheVyrusx · 2021-12-24T08:21:00+00:00

I did this when I was younger, but now that I treat women the way they treated me and it’s been a roller coaster of fun watching their brain melt before my eyes. I’ve had 2 girls from the past who tried to walk all over me BOTH attempting to follow me on social media after I completely cut contact with them. I’ve also shot down a few bartenders my friend wouldn’t shut up about not because they were interested in me but because I don’t just randomly add people. They took major offense to it because they’re being “nice” but I didn’t budge and declined adding them.

Legitimate-Ad-6267 · 2021-12-25T00:43:48+00:00

Did you know she was a narcissist before all this?

lifebehardman · 2021-12-25T03:37:20+00:00

You didnt even have to ask this question bro, you know the truth... Youre a simp....

Admirable-Device-541 · 2021-12-24T15:48:21+00:00

Where are all the women that dont agree with this? Or even care to say that this is wrong

coloradocaniac · 2021-12-24T19:57:26+00:00

Never cohabitate.

daniellederek · 2021-12-25T01:08:53+00:00

You fucked up. 1st call Tuesday to landlord and get off the lease. If you are under restraining order he can't expect rent to be backstopped by you.

Altctrldelna · 2021-12-25T01:09:47+00:00

Sounds like sunk cost fallacy to me. Did you do to much? Yes, now cut ties and move the hell on. She's someone else's problem now and be happy she is. Considering the dude at least thinks he stole her from you chances are high he's going to get bored of her and leave. When this happens you do not fucking go back to her damn it! She's already proven she's willing to fuck you over and you need to know she's going to try to do it again if the option is available.

High-Fruit-Trinity · 2021-12-25T02:11:11+00:00

First, Post back to the guy: "It's your turn".

Then get a Lawyer who's willing to go after her.

Title	Did I mess up
Author	RadiantWrangler8513
Upvotes	29
Comments	43
Date	December 24, 2021 3:57 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/rndeko/did_i_mess_up/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/did-i-mess-up.1090907 https://theredarchive.com/post/1090907

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