First post to reddit ever, so go easy on me.

i was circumcised as an infant, but i never knew anything about it growing up. My parents never talked to me about it. Not even my father. Even when i did find out that i was, i just took it as a fact and didn't think anything of it. i didn't even really know what it was, which is partly because i didn't want to know, i guess.

From seeing the topic brought up in this subreddit so often i learned more about it. Recently i finally watched the Penn and Teller Bullshit episode about circumcision, which opened my eyes to the whole thing.

Words cannot express how awful i feel, knowing what was done to me by my own parents. i don't understand how they could have done that to me, not tell me anything about it, and then still tell me that they love me. It's like they just hoped that i would never find out.

i broke down and cried. It was the first time i've cried in years. How am i supposed to think of my parents? How am i supposed to talk to them about it? How am i supposed to explain to my girlfriend of three years (first relationship for both of us) that my penis was mutilated and this isn't how it's supposed to be?

i feel a huge amount of humiliation and shame for not even knowing that i was mutilated for so long and betrayed and angry at my parents for doing it.

i hope this is relevant here. i found a lot of my information on circumcision here, so i thought i'd vent. Any similar feelings from you guys?

And thanks for existing and spreading information like this.