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Touched Shoulder at Work.

Temporary-Weekend622

February 19, 2023
39 upvotes
/r/MensRights
https://www.moosejawtoday.com/local-news/former-city-employee-given-probation-for-sexually-assaulting-co-worker-6561726
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Post Information
Title Touched Shoulder at Work.
Author

Temporary-Weekend622

Upvotes 39
Comments 29
Date February 19, 2023 9:50 PM UTC
(3 years ago)
Subreddit Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/116p0s2/touched_shoulder_at_work/
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/touched-shoulder-at-work.1152071
https://theredarchive.com/post/1152071

Comments

[–]alclarkey 19 points20 points21 points 3 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Talk about an overreaction, holy fuck.

[–]Empty_Pomegranate362 11 points12 points13 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

That's what I was thinking. Like Jesus Christ, the guy touched your back and shoulder and he got totally fucked for it. The absurdity of this makes me ashamed to call myself a canadian

[–]MisterDamage 8 points9 points10 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

It worked out exactly as she intended. He's talking to her about her office conduct and now he's fired and disgraced instead of her having to alter her own conduct.

[–]AirSailer 11 points12 points13 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Other conditions include keeping the peace and being of good behaviour, taking sex offender programming, not being anywhere near the woman and providing a DNA sample.

SMH.

[–]IronJohnMRA 12 points13 points14 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

it did compromise her sexual integrity

What does that mean?

[–]AfterRemorse -1 points0 points1 point 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

She liked it. Lol.

[–]Ferbuggity 22 points23 points24 points 3 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

.This incident has caused “huge consequences” for both parties, and ile Sture has faced severe stress since then, the woman has faced more based on her victim impact statement, Judge Darryl Rayner said. 

What.

I'd be so damn ashamed to have a woman like that in my family. What a terrible person.

[–]Contranovae 7 points8 points9 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I really thought I was reading a satirical site, but the other content was normal.

OMFG.

[–]External_Start_1815 9 points10 points11 points 3 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

Should've fought the charges would've been an easy win, anyways hope he counter-sues

[–]dope_star 20 points21 points22 points 3 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

Not in Canada. All men are guilty even if proven innocent in Canada.

[+]External_Start_1815 -11 points-10 points-9 points 3 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

No that's bullshit. There's a reason rape has such a low conviction rate it's bc u need evidence

[–]McSkittlefarts 7 points8 points9 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

but, it would not change the fact that he would have still lost his job, and he would be judged but everyone around him forever. that is the parts that matter anyways

[–]Throwawaydhxj 2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Well even if so id rather not have a sexual assault conviction on my record.

[–]MathematicianNo4277 2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Touching people is a biologically necessary way of communicting and relating. For some people, such as those with dementia and other neurodegenerative diseases as well as attention deficit disorders, it's often the only way to catch their attention in an effective manner. Societies where people don't touch have higher rates of depression and suicide. A person needs about seven touches a day to keep their sanity.

You might not like being touched, but like all humans you need it. A hand on the back or the shoulder is neither a sexual nor aggressive touch. If you don't like it, suck it up and get used to it. Not everything in life is to everyone's liking, that shouldn't make us turn the world in an impersonal, cold and lonely place.

[–]pazz -3 points-2 points-1 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I feel like I'm taking crazy pills, why are so many people down voting the idea that you shouldn't touch people at work without their consent... This is day one stuff people

[+]pazz -15 points-14 points-13 points 3 years ago (21 children) | Copy Link

Don't touch people unless invited to... It's not a hard concept, just don't do it.

If someone offers their hand for a handshake then you can choose to take it or reject it. You wouldn't want them to just reach down and grab your hand right? Apply this same reasoning to any situation you might initiate contact with someone.

Don't touch people. Don't.

[–]arrouk 12 points13 points14 points 3 years ago (20 children) | Copy Link

That isn't how life works though. I touch and am touched many times every day, men and women. We live on top of each other, interaction is inevitable.

[+]pazz -11 points-10 points-9 points 3 years ago (19 children) | Copy Link

I disagree with your assertion that strangers touching me is inevitable. If I'm in public crowds at some event that is shoulder to shoulder then yes, because it's crowded, but I control my exposure to crowds, it is a choice, not inevitable. If I'm at work, no, fuck that.

[–]arrouk 11 points12 points13 points 3 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

Get on public transport at rush hour.

Walk down a crouded street to work.

I guarantee not shaking hands at work will cost you.

Social interaction happens, people touch and bump into each other daily.

[+]pazz -10 points-9 points-8 points 3 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Ok, but bumping into someone is not the same as putting your hands on them. Keep your graspers to yourself. Also, It is implied by the context of the post that I'm talking about in the work environment. Not in crowded public settings...

[–]McSkittlefarts 15 points16 points17 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

at work a woman was on her phone and bumped into me. then put her hand on my shoulder and was like I am sorry for knocking your drink to the floor. I should probably press charges and try to get her fired and arrested

[–]luttkarm 1 point2 points3 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

lmfao

[–]TurbulentFlow7145 6 points7 points8 points 3 years ago (14 children) | Copy Link

No, your demand of never being touched in any way shape or form unless being invited is simply put, a joke. Humans touch, it’s normal. Rather than trying to change the world to meet your strange demands maybe you should just remove yourself from contact with people.

If we continue marching down this joke of a path, we’ll have people like you banning eye contact because it makes them uncomfortable

[–]pazz -4 points-3 points-2 points 3 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link

It is literally illegal to touch someone else... If you don't believe me try touching a cop next time you see one.

[–]TurbulentFlow7145 4 points5 points6 points 3 years ago (12 children) | Copy Link

You ever have someone pat you on the back? You want them to be punished for that? You do realize that not all touch is sexual right?

[–]pazz -1 points0 points1 point 3 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link

I have never once in any of my comments said people should be punished for sexual assault for that. But if you want to take an example of the least offensive touch and imply I think the harshest penalty should be applied to it then go ahead and be that way.

It doesn't change the fact that touching someone without consent CAN get you in trouble. And you should not touch people you work with without consent. These are straight up facts. Why is everyone down voting me for this.

[–]TurbulentFlow7145 2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago* (10 children) | Copy Link

I want you to take a step back, rethink what is being discussed in the article, think about what your main concern is and how you approached the very serious matter of having your life ripped apart because you touched someone’s shoulder, because that is what happened and that’s what is being discussed

The only thing you have to offer in this conversation is “never ever touch someone unless you receive verbal consent, and that includes patting someone on the back”

You are using the horrible example of what happened to this man to provide proof as to why you should not ever touch someone unless given verbal consent, even if that touch is a friendly gesture. You didn’t even bother addressing how awful and ridiculous it is that this man is being punished so severely for touching someone’s back

[–]pazz -1 points0 points1 point 3 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link

I agree that the reaction he got seems disproportionate to the action taken.

But I stand by the point that he should never have been touching her in any way without her consent.

Every workplace I have been in has made this clear and multiple sexual harassment trainings have also reinforced this idea. You may not intend to cause harm, but you can still be creating a hostile workplace with very innocent behaviors. Everyone deserves to feel safe in the workplace and I urge you to reconsider why this bothers you so much. Do you behave like this in the workplace? Do you feel entitled to touch people in ways you feel are nnocent? I urge you to reconsider defending that behavior.

[–]TurbulentFlow7145 2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago* (8 children) | Copy Link

You seem to be conflating sexual touching with normal human contact.

I actually almost never initiate touch, but I know the difference between a friendly pat on the back and SA

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