Female dread game

Camille11325 · 2016-12-16T20:55:19+00:00

Yay!!

So we totally need a new name other than “dread game” so that people don’t get the wrong idea (building off of /u/PhantomDream09’s comment how about “desire game”?). But what the two approaches have in common is that they are used when normal RP means aren’t enough to achieve the desired results. Men use dread game when the issue is their wives, women can use “desire game” when they have done all they can through normal RPW strategy and need a more focused solution to the issue. In these cases their man may be at fault, or it could be something else that isn’t 100% in her direct control. I thought about some conditions where this female version could be applied:

Outside of LTR - You really like a guy but he isn’t escalating commitment. This would be a last ditch effort before nexting him.
Within an LTR, prior to marriage - You love this man, want to spend the rest of your life with him, but he isn’t showing any signs of proposing. Again the final solution may be leaving him.
Within an LTR that is clearly headed to marriage and also within marriages - You love this man but there is disharmony. He might be too beta, too alpha, or disinterested in general. You are doing what you can but the issue isn’t 100% your fault. How to make things better without leaving him, controlling him, or arguing?
Married only - You suspect your man has a wandering eye or he may already be involved with someone else. You are interested in salvaging the relationship and winning back his focus.

What do you guys think of these conditions, did I leave anything out?

mabeol · 2016-12-16T21:44:00+00:00

I’ll provide the disclaimer that I’m a bit of a kindergartener when it comes to raw RP theory. If I am totally wrong… inform me thusly.

Let’s use the analogy of dangling a carrot. Here’s how I see it:

When a man is applying dread game to get sex, he is the carrot, and he is dangling himself (heh) in front of other women while his partner watches.
When a woman is applying dread game, she is the carrot, and she is dangling herself in front of her desired partner.

I think CQ is right that doing it the guy’s way is counterintuitive. A man is creating more or less literal dread, the awful realization that your partner can and will leave. He’s drawing his partner back to him through fear. A woman, on the other hand, should create intrigue, desire, and (holla at my girl Helen) fascination. She draws her desired partner through her feminine gifts.

So, for women, the goal is to show what you have to offer on that front—without giving up the goodies too early. Give a preview of your feminine skills – a homecooked meal, a listening ear (without advice giving!), a super cute outfit that hints at your underneath hotness without showing it all – but not the full benefits package that he’ll get once you’re official.

Obviously sex is the final arrow in your quiver, but he can get sex from a plate. The point is to show that he can get sex and many other wonderful things from you!

Personally, I don't think I would like numerical stages, though. I prefer the RPW idea of the toolkit: you use what you need as you need it rather than following a prescribed plan.

PhantomDream09 · 2016-12-16T20:50:12+00:00

Male Dread is more proactive and is constructed in a way that both influences and directs a woman’s intentions, interest, and cooperation (hopefully her sexual interest will increase and her willingness to be a more engaging participant in the dynamic sexually). Keeping the Leader/Follower system in mind, it makes sense that ‘male dread’ involves more overt ‘possible consequences’ (actions) for a woman’s continued disinterest (sexual inaction).

On the other side of the coin, ‘Female Dread’ (which I want to stress should never be thought of as ‘permission to manipulate’ or an endorsement by the RPW community to scheme) should similarly maintain the Leader/Follower dynamic. Thus, instead of asserting control, or trying to overtly direct, the woman utilizes more passive, encouraging measures to persuade (or earn) a more beneficial outcome. A woman that wants to be desired by a man (via increased commitment or more preferable treatment), should focus on evoking his desire to look after and protect her (not by creating drama or feigning weakness but) by exhibiting vulnerability, softness, devotion and trust.

A man will invest more into areas of his life that he sees the potential to grow and increase his quality of life. A good woman that can offer domestic perks as well as enjoyable feminine companionship will be far more appealing, than an ‘aggressive’ and incorrect application of female dread that prompts a woman to flirt shamelessly, or use one man’s interest to ‘twist’ her man into feeling he has to act. Female Dread (in my opinion) should seed a sense of loyalty, benefit, and bring security. The man ‘fears’ losing the woman because she makes him so happy and is clearly a net benefit to his life in many ways.

Now, I think it’s easier for single women (looking to earn commitment) to ‘upgrade’ from an informal to official relationship. For the women that are already tied to a man, it’s exponentially harder to try and affect changes that rely on the man doing something (anything) differently. I want to be very careful about how user’s discuss this aspect of ‘female dread’ - because the encouragement of destructive, caustic, and damaging behaviors and thought patterns will absolutely not be tolerated.

Really, female dread (in large part) is a focused and successful execution of the normal things this community already supports (all of which is outlined in Camille’s Female Sexual Strategy thread.

I almost want to use a different term other than ‘dread’...because I see the male and female applications as two distinct entities, that when combined create a yin/yang form of harmony. The man is literally trying to create dread and inspire a physical response (sexual interest and engagement) from the woman; but it’s more like the woman is trying to inspire and encourage change and investment from the man. In Camille’s FSS post (linked earlier) she has a section labeled ‘Desired Future’ and the dichotomy of “Dread/Desire” to express male dread as it relates specifically to the other side of the coin (female dread) female desiring change from the man (in the form of explicit commitment, or behavioral alterations). I think it would make a lot of sense, and clear the air from the very start, to re-define ‘female dread’ as a more positive, and distinct term that sufficiently divorces it from all the negative thoughts and behaviors that we want to prevent women from considering/utilizing.

Male dread and ‘female dread’ (desire) are not interchangeable concepts, they should be unique and relevant to the person in question, and their position within a relationship (leader or follower, Captain or First Mate). It’s so important to avoid the promotion of bad (anti-RPW behavior).

As for the specific steps of increasing desire in the man for the woman, I haven’t really fleshed those aspects out fully. I do really like the distinction between building ‘desire’ for a single woman, and how a married/committed woman will raise the level of ‘desire’ however.

This is such a great starting point though, and I'm really excited about fleshing out the details! :0)

Edit: /u/CoochQuarantine's comment exemplifies the confusion and misunderstanding that I think is really important to clear up and avoid from the very start. The community will absolutely not be promoting the male approaches and concepts of dread (either in execution or philosophical thought) to the female implementation of desire [female dread]. I am also fully aware that it was not (and is not) at all /u/yetieater's intention to suggest that women should apply male dread game into their own dating approach. He is positing a new area for exploration, refinement, and conversation. :0)

CoochQuarantine · 2016-12-16T20:18:44+00:00

So I think that female dread can exist in that you could pull those 12 levels with your man. However, I think the female approach to dating/marriage is to limit what dread you inflict on your relationship. I would say some things you would want to eliminate are friendships with men, flirtatious behaviors, dressing too sexy for functions that your man isn't at (I mean some guys are into their women dressing sexy while they are with them), talking about other men to your SO...hmmm those are the ones I can come up with off the top of my head. I'm sure there are more. I don't think it is in the girl game handbook to apply more dread to your relationship. We are supposed to minimize them for our men. That is how we show respect, deference, and (most importantly) loyalty, which is one of the things a man wants in a relationship.

[deleted] · 2016-12-16T22:00:51+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Female dread game

Dread game for women:

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Comments

Title	Female dread game
Author	yetieater
Upvotes	11
Comments	20
Date	December 16, 2016 7:17 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWives
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWives/comments/5iq477/female_dread_game/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWives/female-dread-game.209286 https://theredarchive.com/post/209286