I do not deserve this man.

winndixie · 2015-01-15T03:37:56+00:00

More sex.

The reason why "treat women like an asshole cause nice guys finish last" perpetuates is that assholes get rewarded with great sex and what people would call helpful "beta" behavior gets nothing more than a thank you card (not to say bad about your bf, this is just what other people would say).

More sex. And if already a lot of sex, turn sex into a gift card, put 100 sexes in it and let him can cash it in the future.

EDIT: ENTHUSIASTIC sex.

EDIT2: I hope you're just being facetious in saying "this man is too good for you". Low self esteem can ruin good relationships. Enjoy him and be grateful, no negativity! Also, sex.

Aine_of_knockaine · 2015-01-14T09:23:00+00:00

how can I let him know that even with this horrible thing going on that he is a bright spot in my life?

Tell him and show him. * I appreciate how supportive you've been with me with everything that has been going on. * It means a lot that you're here for me when I need you. * Text him a nice little note or write him one. * Cook him dinner. * Do something he enjoys that you might not. * Men are fixers. If you have a problem that you bring to him he's going to want to fix it. While he can't stop death he can make you feel better so let him. Letting him do this can help him to feel valued. There are tons of ways to show your appreciation and to verbalize it.

It's still a relatively new relationship, if that matters, but I want him to know that in spite of what is happening with me, he still plays a very important part in my life. How do I do that without seeming insane?

Tell him. * You're important to me. * You mean a lot to me. * Be kind and respectful to him. * Treat him well.

And also that how do I let him know that this insane pile of crap that the universe is throwing at me is not normal? This is harder. You can tell him, but it might be hard to believe for some people. You can also show him with your actions that you're still a balanced human being who is just going through some rough times.

Bortasz · 2015-01-15T08:47:15+00:00

Give him sex.

Men do not speak. Men DO. Because for us it is more important to do something than speak about it.

You love him? SHOW, DON"T TELL.

Give him nice stripteaser, come to him on knees, with enthusiasm rub tent of his pants with you cheek and then look in his eyes and says:
- Thank you for being there for me. Now I be here for you.
And give him blowjob, handjob, titjob and than proceed to giving him so many ups and downs that he will be force to walk side ways.

This is how you thank men for being there for you.

You want tell him that he is important because this is how YOU WOMEN share feelings. For him speaking is meaningless compare to doing stuff.

This question should be on RP, not on RPW. You want make men happy and appreciate. You should ask men for advice. And advice that all men will give you is give him the most enthusiastic sex marathon that you are capable.

The second advice will be make him food. Third do not talk to much.

Stereotypes exist for a reason. They work. After all of this you can set on his lap and tweet how happy you are that you have him. But first give him sex, food, and moment of silent to appreciate all that he have.

MisterTrucker · 2015-01-19T06:03:32+00:00

Just spill it to him. Tell him so he clearly understands how much he means to you.

The advise of sex is not what I recommend as you are probably not in the mood. If he's decent at all he will understand. Your going thru a tough time.

When you return and always, treat him like a King. Your sun and stars. And he needs to treat you like his Queen.

Humankeg · 2015-01-14T21:46:00+00:00

Worry about yourself and your mother's last little while first. He comes second here. If he is as great as you make him out to be he will understand. Once things have settled down, then it's time to make him aware of how appreciative you are of him.

TheTerrorSquad · 2015-01-14T09:25:54+00:00

I'm so sorry to hear your news. Times like this really bring out the best and the worst in people and, I guess, your SO is proving you can rely on him :-)

Everyone goes through bad times and yes I'd say it's ok to fall apart a little but it's not an excuse for bad behaviour.

"how do i let him know without being insane "

Let him be the rock. Be vulnerable and allow him to play the role he wants to in all of this, you don't need to tell him just show him.

I wish you all the best and hope the future is as good as it can be

aZombieKitten · 2015-01-14T22:03:57+00:00

Just be appreciative of what he's doing for you, both in actions and in words. I'm sure he understands that since you are losing a parent, you may be a bit different in behavior for a bit (like being extra emotional) and that you need someone to be strong. You can let him know how you feel about him helping you so much with this issue. I doubt he assumes you are always like this.

Additionally, I am sorry for your loss. Losing a parent is never easy.

OkieState · 2015-01-14T22:59:46+00:00

First, I hate that this emotional trauma comes early in the relationship. LTR and death of a parent each have their own baggage. Trying to get an LTR off the ground while dealing with this kind of loss is a tough hand to be dealt.

That said, the issue here is communication, as others have pointed out. But you need a short cut, so here it is: Love languages. It won't take you an hour to look it up and figure out this dude's love language. Then make damn sure that these things are communicated to him in a language to which he is receptive.

The mere fact that you are prescient enough to even ask these questions in the midst of your pain leads me to predict crazy success for the both of you.

Good luck.

red_tux · 2015-01-15T00:22:54+00:00

In this case I would argue for "less is more." Just say thank you, but keep it to about 50 words or so. Let him engage you in conversation or just appreciate your kind words.

A long time ago someone asked me why I kept repeating something. To me I was showing how emphatic I was about something, but they said something that stuck with me. "I was once a security guard, and I learned that when someone repeated something more than once it often meant they were lying to me."

Treat your words like they are expensive things and use them judiciously. Also as others have said, actions speak louder than words.

whimsicalweasel · 2015-01-14T16:43:31+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Title	I do not deserve this man.
Author	whimsicalweasel
Upvotes	17
Comments	34
Date	January 14, 2015 8:58 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/2sdujj/i_do_not_deserve_this_man/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/i-do-not-deserve-this-man.85152 https://theredarchive.com/post/85152

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