Understanding redpill

TankVet · 2017-09-19T15:00:38+00:00

For me, it was always just about being an adult. It was about self-improvement, maturity, and discipline. Yeah, it happens to be a sexual strategy and I think it's obnoxious that it's being treated as a misogynistic magic trick to get women into bed, but that's not what it was for me. I liked the effects it had on me, I took the good and left what didn't work. It was a philosophy to being a better man.

nonamanuensis · 2017-09-19T16:39:14+00:00

Taking the "red pill" means that I see the uncomfortable realities of male vs female sexual strategies and goals and I take them into account in my own relationships. RP does not mean that I necessarily like these realities or think they are super awesome but it doesn't matter if I think 2+2 is unfair or immoral - it is what it is. I have come to really appreciate the interesting ways the differing strategies have shaped humanity and the solutions we've come up with to balance the pulls. And with RP I can come to acceptance rather than fighting, blaming, or criticizing men (and women) for doing what they do.

I do not like the manipulation of RP - even if men and women are different I think respect and honesty will always result in more goals being met and people being happier than using dread game or women faking or manipulating their appearance or personality to be more "RP". I do believe in being who you are since that's what you'll be best at - even the most powerful women can submit to a powerful man, it doesn't mean she should tamp down her power. She may end up with an ugly powerful man if she isn't gorgeous, but that's RP ruthless truth that most people don't like. Lying about N count, being deceitful by omission, wishing without asking, manipulating with sex, making women afraid you will leave them, supporting pornography (which in my mind is sexual images for men and encouraging women's "100 bullet point" list of Prince Charming/Mr. Darcy must-have's for men), accepting the legal system which is heavily weighed in favor of women who don't live up to the responsibility inherent in marriage and family building, shaming new mothers to lose weight unhealthily, etc....those are NOT RP attitudes or behaviors to me, but that is all my interpretation. I do not agree with a lot in these subs but there's enough truth to find it worthwhile. It certainly won't be in popular culture.

RP can be used differently depending on your goals. For a lot of (understandably) angry men, they have decided to give up on having a lifelong partnership with a woman to build a family and raise children. Their goal is to enjoy women but they will age with diminishing meaning to life (my opinion, I totally understand their view but I pity them for it). For a lot of women, they have decided to try to lead instead of being a good dancer in their pair and they will have to put up with lifelong dissatisfaction with men while their female power declines (again, judge/pity). There is a submission/dominance circuit in mammals for sexuality and partnership. It does not mean that a woman is lifeless and spineless but that she puts down the "girl power!" crap that our culture teaches (at the expense of male natural testosterone and aggression and it's resulting spectacular risk taking and creative achievements and stability) and submits to the needs of the family and recognizes the great amount of resources that men give to their families and society.

Women are the gatekeepers of sex. Women create children - as "sexist" as it sounds, that is what women give to a family and what they have to offer. (So if a man doesn't want a family I agree with some angry men - women are useless other than sex toys and you will attract women who will be able to offer nothing more). Pregnancy/childbirth/childrearing is a HUGE and risky psychological and physical responsibility so women are careful about whom they are giving children to - hence they should be very careful about having sex.

Men are the gatekeepers of commitment. Men provide protection and resources to the family unit. Single motherhood is hard now, imagine how hard it would be in harsher times in the past. Women rely heavily on men. (So if a woman doesn't want a family, yes be as Girl Power as you want. But women are finding out that they do want a family, that raising children is often a primal want, and that the costs are heavy and if you thought you were supposed to be "independent" then you don't know how to submit and take the lead with this necessary vulnerability.) Again, pregnancy/childbirth/childrearing is a huge and risky endeavor so men are careful about the women they commit to. It is easy for a man to leave after impregnating a woman and it's not surprising that men leave and selfishly that makes the most sense - it's surprising and beautiful that they stay because they understand the long term game of family building.

The Wall - Appearances give information about health and fertility. RP means that, for women, our first impression appearance is important. We would be silly to demand that men "like me for me!" when our brains are looking for clues about health and fertility. And the bargaining power that women have is stronger the younger we are - it behooves us to find a partner earlier rather than waiting for our 30s. Humans take this to the extreme with body modifications of all sorts because the brain likes easy interpretations. In this sense, looks are not everything and it's silly for older women to try to continue to appear like a fertile teenager, but the importance of looks cannot be denied.

The Wall is also where the horizons switch. Until the Wall, women have the upper hand in the sexual market. After the Wall, men's resources and status usually increase while women's looks and fertility decrease. A woman gives up her youth and opportunities with potential higher value males in return for long term commitment and resources from her man.

The Wall is extremely hard for women. For most women, we are used to getting attention when we are younger due to nothing but our youthful looks. This drops off as we age. For men, the opposite happens and they are tempted to give up their women and find preWall women. Women have to learn humility with aging acceptance and how to be mothers/coaches/mentors for younger women after the Wall. The Wall marks the pinnacle of female individual power and starts the transition to mother/family/wife power as the man's power increases and the children need support from their mother. Modern and immature men do not entirely understand and accept the Wall either - demanding a woman take the shape of a teenage girl after motherhood is immature. Asking a wife to be sexually available is reasonable but asking her to look like a teenager sets everyone up for unmet expectations. Men are giving up access to youth for commitment to them and their children. If men don't want a family, they don't get young sexual partners unless they want to divorce and keep marrying young women. They can do that, but they are setting their children up for pain and desertion and I believe it is irresponsible.

cont...

Pink_182 · 2017-09-19T14:34:00+00:00

I'm relatively new here, but I notice from reading the the red pill (reddit for men) and red pill women, that they don't always jive together, which makes it a lot harder to understand what the whole thing is about

I think r/lettheflamedie did a really good job of explaining why that is: the men on TRP tend to be angry and lashing out at women in general, which makes it hard to get a sense of the theory. They have a lot of posts about how stupid and worthless women are for anything but sex, but I don't think that is the the main movement.

I think it is more about understanding the psychology that we have been conditioned to- because let's be honest our mating strategies are more psychology/sociology than biology- which makes us more successful in the dating and relationship game.

I don't think you have to subscribe to everything in order for it to be useful. Example: I have been very successful in my research career and intend to continue on being successful. I have no plans to stop working or make career sacrifices. However, RPW has given me a lot of advice about the pitfalls and potential problems with this strategy. This is a bit different from traditional dating advice which would tell me that there are no pitfalls to my strategy. I think RP is a bit more honest about some things.

lettheflamedie · 2017-09-19T13:24:59+00:00

From a male perspective:

Redpill is an understanding and acceptance of biological imperatives, and a sexual strategy to achieve what you want and need. Redpill is a repudiation of "everyone's the same" sexuality, and focuses on the differences and complimentarity of male and female sexuality. Redpill women, from what I have seen, tend to be closer to the ideal of both the biological imperatives and the humanity which stems from it (instead of just base instincts) whereas redpill men, conditioned and abused by a very long time to be societal whipping boys, embrace the biology, and but rarely the responsibility, preferring, instead, to be the cock carousel, instead of realizing when it's their turn to shut down the ride, because they have found the right first mate.

Tl;dr: It's a focus on male and female sexuality at a primal level, without too much froofy bullshit.

girlwithabike · 2017-09-19T14:38:07+00:00

What part are you confused about?

lidlredridinghood · 2017-09-19T15:57:08+00:00

Rp is a set of observations about humans, that can be applied to life in many ways.

est-la-lune · 2017-09-19T15:59:24+00:00

The main reasons I read RP and post here:

I made the same mistake in my relationships repeatedly. I expected commitment but repeatedly make the mistake of having sex too soon and becoming too emotionally attached. "Women are the gatekeepers of sex and men are the gatekeepers of commitment" is the adage that allowed me to break my pattern of behavior. RP is one of the few communities that openly recognizes this truth and doesn't disavow it as oppressive or old-fashioned.
A few years ago I recognized that my past experiences were negative because I made bad choices that stemmed out of pathological behaviors. I am not a particularly traditional or conservative person, but I think relationships in the 21st century are suffering because people have completely erased the script. Anything goes - except not everything works. I was tired of using my heart and my body to learn through trial-and-error what my divorced parents couldn't teach me about love and relationships.

LuckyLittleStar · 2017-09-19T16:36:05+00:00

Please read the side bar to learn what the red pill is about. If you're still confused, next time ask more specific questions.

Title	Understanding redpill
Author	KateCoger
Upvotes	6
Comments	32
Date	September 19, 2017 12:43 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/712pjp/understanding_redpill/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/understanding-redpill.73452 https://theredarchive.com/post/73452

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