https://www.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/a8861g/boyfriend_asks_how_i_feel_about_open_relationships/?st=JQJVD6EV&sh=6fa9e6b1

Hi ladies. I want to say thank you so much for your responses on my last post. I have a large capacity for empathy so I tend to get confused during times of conflict. When I can see both sides of an argument, it is hard to honor my own wishes. Thank you for helping me stand by my convictions.

I told him that I don’t want to talk about possibilities of bringing others into our bedroom when we currently have an unstable sex-life. He heard me out. It felt like we were very much on the same page and I felt a peace about the situation.

And now: we’ve had sex once I believe in the past couple of weeks. Didn’t have sex on any holiday. Not that I require that, but we had a little bit of time together and they were celebratory occasions.

I feel alone in our bedroom. I feel like the roles are switched and he is the gatekeeper of sex and I am the gatekeeper of commitment. He is adamant about being with me and committed to me; I am constantly hoping for sex.

I have: tried initiating, dressing up, starting role play, saying a couple times over a long period of time that “I want a better sex life.” A couple of these have worked in very short-lived receptions of my desire. And I still feel about as desirable to him as a potato. I am in-shape, young, wear makeup and feminine clothing. I am submissive to him, yada yada.

I am thinking very seriously about closing the sex gate for a time. I suspect he is completely taking me for granted and that his porn usage plays a large role in his lack of desire for me. We also live together, so breaking up is not a viable option and I don’t want to give up on him yet. I feel like I am losing my dignity and self-esteem by trying to solve this problem. I feel so empty that I would just like to take a step back and unravel my thoughts about sex. I want to protect myself from what feels like constant rejection.

I understand that this could blow up in my face. I know rpw teaches that we shouldn’t reject our men sexually. But I have turned down sex maybe twice in our 4 year relationship. I am at a loss at this point. I don’t fear an implosion as much as I fear doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.

What are your thoughts? If you agree, should I let him know that I want a break from sex? If you disagree, why? Alternative solution?