Avoid the Negative, the Jealous, The Lame

absolv · 2014-04-04T12:28:04+00:00

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Jaqar · 2014-04-04T11:43:03+00:00

Well put.

I'd also like to add for those like me, who see people through slightly rose tinted glasses, the "negative, jealous and lame" are in a much greater abundance than you might expect.

There is nothing wrong in assuming good in people you meet, but keep this in mind to avoid frequent disappointment.

Red_August · 2014-04-04T14:50:34+00:00

There's an aphorism that says something to the effect that we are the composite or average of the five closest people we hang with. Do the exercise yourself. I can attest that as I have progressed in life, and outgrown my past, I have sought to respectfully and progressively surround myself with people I admire - people that challenge me and push me intellectually, in achievement, and in social standing. Remaining in my comfort zone would likely have resulted in me picking a station in life and to surround myself with people I would easily compare favourably against but I've gained so much more by seeking the positive tension brought by people I respect and aspire to become. This isn't just some social climbing bullshit but a quality of life thing.

RedPillDad · 2014-04-04T12:23:24+00:00

Once your eyes are open, you see how shitty and weak most people are. You can call them on their shit, but sometimes better to use the swift sword and cut them loose.

2014-04-04T13:37:50+00:00

So true. We are often the product of the people we spend the most time with. Best to spend your time with winners.

2014-04-04T14:50:11+00:00

I tell everyone who wants to improve to get rid of the negative in their life first. Everything after that is easy. I spend most of my time in the place I am at right now alone, simply because I don't meet anyone worth my time.

PaulRivers10 · 2014-04-04T22:35:50+00:00

While the point about getting chronically negative, jealous, and lame people out of your life, I feel like this poster is overreacting in the opposite direction.

I've done this myself - and gotten rid of friends that I shouldn't have.

I agree on the first one - friends who are chronically a problem are - a problem. Friends shouldn't be trying to make you look bad (particularly when there's no gain for themselves) to begin with, and friends don't keep doing it when you ask them to stop.

It's true that it's rude to leave someone waiting, particularly when you're meeting 1 on 1. But while it makes sense not to meet with them again, if they've been useful to you (loaning you money), I see no reason to turn into a passive aggressive little girl and tell everyone how magical you think you are because you deleted their number. What, were you afraid you'd be overcome with emotion and call them?

Lots of socially useful people are chronically late. Lots of guys who are good with women are flaky. I've found if you get rid of them, you don't many socially useful friends left.

It's not alpha/beta, or male/female - it's simply that people who are popular have more demands on their time. Cut them out, you cut out people who are socially useful.

If they're chronic about it, don't continue letting them put you in that position, but thinking "here's someone I can't talk to any more" is being new to the social system. Feel free to text them "It's been half an hour, I gotta go" and only agree to meet them where it's convenient for you (tell them to stop by the gym if they want their money back where you'll be anyways).

Bottom line - yeah, cut people loose who are chronically negative, jealous in a way that's not good for you. But if you cut everyone loose who's ever late, you must be new to the social system. You'll find that a lot of the people who are useful are often late. Just don't put yourself in positions where that's a problem for you - if you meet them, meet them somewhere you're going to be already.

football1010 · 2014-04-04T17:25:13+00:00

OP I agree with you. The downside though is those without many friends could get lonely. It is hard to find RP'ers out in society.

Kunichi · 2014-04-04T13:54:27+00:00

Thanks, i need that

football1010 · 2014-04-04T15:22:11+00:00

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vandaalen · 2014-04-04T18:00:29+00:00

Nearly instantly after I started my journey by quitting alcohol I sorted my circles and dropped many contacts. I cut the ties to maybe about 80% of the people I used to deal with. Not in a angry way. I never had beef with anybody but I simply didn't care about them anymore.

Now, about 15 months later, I find more and more people in my life, that I knew before, but never had much to do with. They reach out and want to make contact and vice versa. These are all people that have goals they want to achieve and try to improve themselves to succeed.

But beware of the suckers! I've also found some people with Dark Triad Traits lurking around and trying to draw me into their sphere because they came to the assumption I may now or in the future be useful for them.

Phaint · 2014-04-04T15:47:56+00:00

You are completely free to add and remove absolutely anything in your life as you please. It's liberating.

no_face · 2014-04-04T13:46:36+00:00

Why would you post pictures of yourself with hot girls on facebook?

For me, FB is a glamorized contact list

2014-04-04T15:36:43+00:00

Negativity is a fuckin plague.

Da_cap-n · 2014-04-04T18:42:26+00:00

Positive flow. Good stuff man. Me and my boys had some issues with our careers since we're at the beginning of our grind. But whenever we're at that low point one of us will tell the other "Hey man, it's all in your mind. Only you can make yourself feel that way."

2014-04-04T19:43:10+00:00

Fantastic! Great reminder. Thank you!

Blood_Vaults · 2014-04-04T22:27:34+00:00

Maybe I'm missing the coach's point, but I can't stand behind that. When it comes to the military no one ever gets left the fuck behind

watersign · 2014-04-04T23:00:31+00:00

I agree. I am a very negative person and people don't like me nor do they want to be around me. I dont want to be around negative people either.

2014-04-04T23:59:15+00:00

Great post. If you are a loser, then you need to make no mistake - you are an addict. You may read all this shit on the internet and decide to give up your addiction, but that will be impossible if you have a network of losers around you. Just like how an alcoholic or heroin addict must cut ties with their drinking / shooting up buddies, a recovering loser must cut ties with loser friends. Then you have a real shot of being successful, because you won't have the constant reminder that you could just go give in and enjoy the dirty high of loserdom.

Plus, its out with the old, in with the new. In purging your social circle of weird omegas and negative betas who you used to do dumb shit with, you create room for positive people (whether alpha or beta), which can add massive value to your life. The trick is though, you cannot go networking and making these friends with the expectation of benefitting from having cool friends. You have to go about it slow, building up a few new solid friends a year, and maintaining the deep friendships you do have.

vengefully_yours · 2014-04-06T16:36:22+00:00

This is where I am now. Cutting ties with people I have known because they are dragging me down and trying to take from me. They want and take without giving, I have no use for them any longer, thus ties are being cut as opportunity arises.

buddhabullshit · 2014-04-04T15:46:58+00:00

It's probably a good sign if it means you've surpassed your friends. Now you need some new ones.

2014-04-04T16:05:37+00:00

AND THIS PERFECTLY SUMS UP WHY I DIVORCE

2014-04-04T14:03:02+00:00

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MachiavellianRed · 2014-04-04T11:38:13+00:00

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abbw2000 · 2014-04-04T14:01:13+00:00

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SittinOnTheDock · 2014-04-05T00:12:02+00:00

Good points. Did you ask your friend at the cafe why he was late? You may have unnecessarily cut off a friend who had a legitimate reason for being late. If you did, then you did the self-respecting thing

sir_wankalot_here · 2014-04-04T13:34:21+00:00

I thought you where talking about women ?

lame - usually requires affirmation, just give her some in small doses when they do what you want. Randomly give them shit.
negative - see above
jealous - get another plate intentionally make them more jealous so they work harder

Title	Avoid the Negative, the Jealous, The Lame
Author	musicvita25
Upvotes	133
Comments	37
Date	April 4, 2014 11:09 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/226kk5/avoid_the_negative_the_jealous_the_lame/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/avoid-the-negative-the-jealous-the-lame.13564 https://theredarchive.com/post/13564

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