Lessons Learned: Oneitis for 6 Years

NeoreactionSafe · 2015-12-11T15:45:48+00:00

Obviously you are now a beta orbiter.

But it's good you are waking up and realizing you were believing a Blue Pill colored myth about the way things were working.

As you gradually wake up and see reality clearly for the first time the world will open up before you and ask:

"What will you do to go your own way?"

...you are taking your first step to growing "up" and having masculinity.

Your choice of Truth over Myth is a good one.

.

UrsusG · 2015-12-11T16:01:45+00:00

But she'll regret rejecting me.

No she won't.

It's good that you're beginning to see reality, but you still need to ascend to the next stage of acceptance - that the girl will most probably not regret anything involving you.

There's plenty of guys there who can offer what you can offer. She will most probably achieve her goals without you and be happy. Deal with it.

Hanging on to your revenge fantasy is bad for you. Your life is for YOU. Your future success is for YOU, it's not a 'I-told-you-so' show for her.

Stop giving a fuck about her as soon as possible, preferably by banging ten other girls instead.

seattleron · 2015-12-11T16:06:23+00:00

When girls are attracted to a man, they look at him. They steal glances and can't help but appreciate with their eyes.

100% correct, and it seems like you are started to ingest TRP. Wake up calls such as this are good for you. Don't look at it as a failed weekend, as it was probably the best thing that could have happened to you. What you did was Blue Pill, Incel, White Knight, AFC (Average Frsutarted Chump) 101.

This girl used you for a free hotel room and a reason to "go on vacation," which is 90% of every SWPL woman's reason for waking up in the morning (that's for another time, but white women like going on vacation more than just about anything else in life).

You need to use this fuel. Grab that feeling of rejection, sadness, and anger, and hold onto it. Let it be a springboard to accomplish things you've always wanted to accomplish. If the motivation to start this is to show this user that some day she will want you, then do it. Hit the gym hard, learn an instrument, build something with your bare hands, approach 100 women over the next month, enroll in school, etc. Whatever it is that you have been wanting to accomplish but haven't had the time or motivation, use this to accomplish what it is that you want to. Post pictures of your new accomplishments on social media and don't explain anything. You don't have time to explain the things that you're doing, because you're too busy doing them. She will see. Let her text you first, then wait 3 days and text back. Don't apologize for the delay, just tell her "Hey stranger what's up i'm about to go" skydiving/guitar lessons/riding my motorcycle/weight lifting competition/etc. Then keep the convo casual, light, and short, then ignore her again for a few weeks while you go do your thing.

In the end, you won't give a shit about this girl or what she thinks, you'll be swimming in other girls and she literally won't matter anymore, but the motivation she gave you to start living your mission in life will be something you'll be glad you used.

yonderposerbreaks · 2015-12-11T16:45:01+00:00

Before you fly halfway across the country and blow a lot of money, be sure she likes you. Don't just assume. I can't argue with the "orbiter" thing, I've been known to have a few in my past. All's it takes is one simple phone call or text to get it solid - "do you like me or not, because if not, I'm not wasting my time". If she fumbles that ball, stay away.

coolwords · 2015-12-11T17:20:49+00:00

But she'll regret rejecting me.>

We need some kind of bot in this sub to detect patterns like this and auto-reply with "Read the sidebar, and the top posts of all time. You shouldn't be posting yet."

I cba doing it myself all the time.

verify_account · 2015-12-11T16:25:14+00:00

Hey don't worry she'll be interested you again in about 10 years :) Assuming you still look like a provider.

VasiliyZaitzev · 2015-12-12T03:32:27+00:00

You can't negotiate attraction.

But she'll regret rejecting me.

Actually, she likely won't. But by the time she does, you won't want her anymore (assuming you have any brains).

Read the sidebar, but particularly Rollo's "Schedules of Mating". Then read his "Hats Off to the Bull" and then ready "Controlling Interests". This is what the type of thinking you are having is getting you into.

Are you familiar with this quote by Sheryl Sandberg?

"When looking for a life partner, my advice to women is date all of them: the bad boys, the cool boys, the commitment-phobic boys, the crazy boys. But do not marry them. The things that make the bad boys sexy do not make them good husbands. When it comes time to settle down, find someone who wants an equal partner. Someone who thinks women should be smart, opinionated and ambitious. Someone who values fairness and expects or, even better, wants to do his share in the home. These men exist and, trust me, over time, nothing is sexier."

What Sandberg is telling women is this: go ride the cock carousel to your heart's consent! Fuck every outlaw biker, every musician in a shitty band (and the lead singer twice), ever pool boy, etc. And then, just at the time your odometer is about to turn over, and the conductor says "Wall Station! Everybody off!", find some chump to marry you. Then become a total harridan and make his life miserable b/c he's no worth of You, the Feminine Goddess^TM who scored all that Alpha Cock back in the day! He should be grateful to breathe the same air as you!

Don't be that chump.

I tell guys they need to Think Horizontally, Not Vertically. All over-investing in your One-itis has gotten you is the Right(!) to be her Orbiter in Chief. She is NEVER going to have sex with you. So what to do? Go build the best you that you can, and Go Talk To Other Girls. No more flying across the country to get friend-zoned.

connectfive5 · 2015-12-11T16:47:16+00:00

She'll still regret rejecting me

This reads to me like "I'm going improve myself for her", honestly man, fuck her, you're friend zoned. Stop bothering even thinking about her, after all i doubt she'll even remember you in a few years. You don't have to prove your worth to her. It's great to see you have direction and you are improving yourself but that line makes it look like, mentally, you haven't really moved on at all.

Revenge will motivate you, there's no doubt about that, but there are other forms of motivation which do not bring paths of anger and hatred. After 6 years of hardship, maybe you should try a different approach, good luck with your social circle.

empatheticapathetic · 2015-12-11T16:37:49+00:00

Bro I'm just getting over some oneitis. 4 months ago it happened and failed due to me being too BP. I've used it to indoctrinate myself into TRP and I'm just suddenly getting over her. I kept using her as motivation for learning TRP until I truly realised "nah it's totally dead with her and I'm actually better off going for something new". I mean I could go to her town right now, display all the attributes I've learned but truly moving on is having that ability and deciding you don't even want to. It's hard and depressing and will take a long long time, but when you get to the other side of it, it's totally great. And there's no reason you won't make it there. Use her as motivation for getting better if you want, it's not a bad reason and you will naturally move on from her when you actually feel happy with what you've learned and the progress you've made.

TRPShill · 2015-12-12T01:05:12+00:00

" I have a good job, make good money for my age, am tall muscular jawboned, but still lacking a lot in personality"

casual reminder that game, charisma, personality is #1

radianceofparadise · 2015-12-11T19:29:51+00:00

Had to learn this the hard way myself- don't become a girl's friend.

If she's opening up to you about personal stuff, but you've never had sex, you are DEFINITELY in the friendzone. Don't have long text conversations throughout the day if you want to bone a girl. That phone should only be used to arrange to meetup.

ckmtpm · 2015-12-11T19:38:35+00:00

All the signs were there -- you purposefully ignored them. I don't think she ever even led you on, it seems like you were firmly a friend from the get go.

You should definitely work on improving yourself, and your confidence, but I wouldn't pin any hopes on her regretting her decision to reject you (though, it may not have even been a conscious rejection if she never thought of you in the way). Some people just won't like you no matter what (for whatever reason, even if you're objectively a great match). There are plenty of fish in the sea, though!

DarkuSchneider · 2015-12-12T11:40:07+00:00

Glad you are starting to see behind the curtain man, hang in there. Yeah I would say she maybe locking you into beta orbit since you can be summoned from long distance. Revenge is pointless, but if you must, the best revenge is to forget her without another word. Keep improving your life and social circle and move on. Just ignore her when she inevitably hits you up for therapy or one day suddenly confesses she liked you all along and wants you now(to lock you down BB). Block her if she gets annoying or tell her off if you must.(nuclear option: Only thing left you can say to me babe is when you will be by to blow me.) Go read the books 'No More Mr. Nice Guy' and 'How to Win Friends and Influence People' if you have not already besides the entire sideboard over and over until it sticks.

hohamocha · 2015-12-17T09:16:03+00:00

The real question is

HOW MUCH DO YOU BENCH PRESS?

Title	Lessons Learned: Oneitis for 6 Years
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	28
Comments	28
Date	December 11, 2015 3:38 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/3wdxsm/lessons_learned_oneitis_for_6_years/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/lessons-learned-oneitis-for-6-years.38820 https://theredarchive.com/post/38820

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