I've seen this come up in several threads now, especially the Tomassi AMA: how important are looks for a man?

I was operating under the theory that men are much more visual and 'superficial' than woman, but I'm starting to think that's just my blue pill training coming through. I always thought that men cared mostly about looks and any HB7+ that looked after herself was going to be basically hounded by male attention. That of course is true, but clearly men want other traits in a woman as well like respect, loyalty, etc... I was under the false impression that women really didn't care as much about looks and would compromise on that. I do think that is true (I see far more men reaching in relationships than women) more so than it is with men, but not to the degree I wished were true. Women really only actively hit on a man when the man is insanely attractive, like 9+. This makes sense though. Women are so sought after (especially with the raising obesity levels that were discussed) by men, that they naturally feel entitled to only the best. We don't blame them for it, we just accept that that is how it is most of the time. Of course women really only notice a man when he's model-esque. They can have super high standards there. So it's not really that women don't care about looks, it's just that they can afford to have much much higher standards when it comes to them pursing.

Essentially what I'm getting at is that only models really have access to that ability to make a woman maximize her lust, whereas any decently attractive woman in her 20s with some girl game can do that to a man. It's the difference between reactive and spontaneous drives right? Perhaps this is why a woman is more likely to compromise. If her drive isn't being sparked and there isn't much in the way of tingles, she may be mostly fine with her less attractive mate. She gets everything else she wants in the relationship like security and support, but sex and lust become less of a priority. Men with spontaneous drives are less likely to make this compromise.

I'm coming to the conclusion that looks are much more important than I previously though. Of course attractive PUAs in the manosphere with a book to sell are going to downplay this, and ghosts who want to just GTOW are going to overplay it, but it is important and probably just as important to a woman as it is to a man. I'm not saying we should give up. I think it just highlights how important it is to work on this part of yourself. You should maximize your SMV as much as you can. Game will certainly help, but you do not want to be working too hard to convince a woman you're attractive. That does not seem like a good frame to enter a relationship. There needs to be some primal attraction going on there. Your game isn't going to matter if you can't get your foot in the door right? And, even if you're some master at game, do you really want to be constantly trying to keep her attracted? Are there not inherent risks in that?