The War Bride Argument

MattyAnon · 2018-07-04T19:10:05+00:00

Ever wonder why she returns to the abusive boyfriend she hopes will change for her?

Her ex wasn't abusive, her ex was sexual.

The endless abusive ex-boyfriend trope is her playing herself as the victim in order to get special treatment from the next (gullible) man. By awakening his desire to protect (white knight) her, she makes him into a beta. By framing sex as abuse she can discern the exact nature of the next man she sees. Does he say "that fucking asshole, I want to kill him" (beta) or does he say "he sounds hot and fun" (guy who knows women).

She reframes her previous ex as being abusive in order to engender beta protective instincts and to get sympathy from other women. It also undermines the guy from telling the truth about her own emotional abuse of him.

When I was younger I thought every woman I dated had been abused in every previous relationship (although why she stuck around was always a mystery)..... until I saw a girl I dumped say the exact same things about me. The only abuse she suffered was being dropped like a hot rock, but the whole relationship was now framed as emotional abuse and everyone hated me for it.

It's all a ruse. She returns to him for hot sex, he wasn't abusive in the slightest, except failing to offer her crazy ass his lifelong commitment.

VasiliyZaitzev · 2018-07-04T20:46:27+00:00

Women, like gold, artwork, fine wines, etc., are war booty. They cannot particularly be blamed for their nature. Ever wonder why it's generally easier for women to pick up a new language? Because defeated men were killed but women were kept for pleasure and breeding, and the ability to learn the new (to them) language quickly improved their value and the likelihood that they would survive.

As to the present difficulties, lads, whistle a happy tune as you sharpen your bayonet, and rejoice that you were born masculine.

FlyingSexistPig · 2018-07-05T00:09:24+00:00

Men represent power.
Women represent wealth.

As with cattle and land, the more women you have the more children you can produce: the wealthier you are. It doesn't matter how many men you have. You can only get one baby every 9 months from each woman. 1 man or 1000 men can impregnate 1000 women.

You only get to keep that wealth if you have more power: more men.

IronProdigyOfficial · 2018-07-04T21:26:35+00:00

"Abusive" keep telling yourself that more than 90% of the time it's a copping mechanism for them to feel perfect and assume no blame in the relationship and then receive support for breaking up with you. Being abusive would entail actual physical or mental abuse. In which case she wouldn't be leaving you years later she'd be getting the fuck out immediately or contacting the authorities. There are plenty of true cases but it's rare and most of the time it's a blanket term. You didn't pamper her and spend every second of your day bending to her will? You're "abusive". I wouldn't read much into it beyond that. As for returning to past love she probably fantasizes it being different than before and only remembers the good moments. Then matching you up to her ex which in her perfect world noone holds a candle to. Keep your value high if she sees her exs value go up she'll probably dart right back to him.

mushroom_overlord · 2018-07-05T00:11:21+00:00

Returning to the abuser is another "feature" of the mechanism that leads to the War Brides phenomenon. The same way she can become attuned to a new strong man who came in and conquered, she can return to a man who is a conqueror in his own right; if he is surviving and successful despite her being whisked away at some point, there is no reason to turn him down just because he failed in the past

Women are simply addicted to that kind of power and control if it means survival despite being treated like shit.

conflagratorX · 2018-07-05T07:56:14+00:00

I think war brides argument is overcomplicated. Women move fast after breakup because they have abundance of options. Simple as that.

Jsieijejeieokkd · 2018-07-05T00:35:44+00:00

Oxytocin is released in the brain and they want more.

WholesomeAwesome · 2018-07-05T01:06:18+00:00

Real time relationships has an answer on that I believe. But it's part of a bigger pill than this subreddit. People abused as children get endorphines when in the same situation of abuse, so they seek it. The brain doesn't know when it no longer has to deal with something it has become good at.

mainer345 · 2018-07-04T18:46:09+00:00

You are focusing too much on the "abusive boyfriend" it is an example for situations in general for someone to return to someone. Maybe he should have used a more Kid friendly example for you.

Red90210 · 2018-07-04T21:19:29+00:00

It’s two thoughts. Why can she leave you so easily is because they adapted to change to a new man quickly. The return/ staying with an abuser is because they developed an emotional armour due to the process of the war winners often being abusive. Thus women tolerate more abuse. (Not saying I agree, just explaining the logic of your quotes

TheLanternFlame · 2018-07-05T06:34:21+00:00

True,

This was nearly the story I got when I was in a retreat last year. Me and my friends stand up when asked who wants to be a warrior for the tribe, but after standing up, we're killed off. The ladies, on the other hand, was told to be breeding material for the tribes that conquered them. And the concept was similar to the post. It was an underlying concept, yet since it was in a church retreat, they can't offend those ladies.

gbdoragnic · 2018-07-05T12:43:30+00:00

> Why does "feminine solipsism" (what i refer to an emotional shield) lead to woman returning to an abusive boyfriend?

I tend to disagree with the comments, a women wants true genuine love,if she is going back to abusers it's because she is a abuser herself and a bad person. Most domestic violence is reciprocal and it's a reflection of who she is.

For example a mother who has been abused by her father will often bring a strange man in to rape her child and when the daughter says, "Mommy this man is raping me", she won't believe her because she wants her to feel pain and be scared.

Another example I see is she has violent and anger and doesn't want to grow as a person so she needs a man at her level, women will not report abusers because they would be proving to themselves that they are unlovable.

If a women says my last boy friend was abusive, she is telling you want she needs, she is saying this is what I like, because it is a reflection of who I'm.

PsychedelicDentist · 2018-07-04T18:44:35+00:00

Read the sidebar

ozaku7 · 2018-07-05T11:17:23+00:00

> The modern version of this is portrayed by the fact that after a breakup women (in general) are very fast to move on and become emotionally detached from the previous relationship with ease.

What do you base this on? My experience is that some women did move on, but they clearly were tired of their current boyfriends or husbands and it was just a formal breakup. The emotional break happened long ago but remained in out of comfort or hope of rekindling the fire that was once between them (aka, the man waking up and manning up).

The other cases were where the woman was still in love with her boyfriend/husband and dumps her instantly, and from such women I observed they just couldn't move on for up to a year.

So honestly, it really depends. The man that will do anything for her is just some pussy she won't have feelings for, but the abusive ex is the type she wants but without the assholery. We all know that women want the best of both worlds, having their cake and eat it too, but we also want to have a hot wife waiting for us in bed and cooking for us after work, taking care of our kids while she allows us to bang side-bitches.

80% of men are pussified, 15-19% of men can only be close to real men by acting abusively and like assholes, which is the closest to the 1-5% of REAL masculine men that know how to handle a girl and how to be a proper man who stands by his principles, norms, values, takes great care of himself and is well respected by peers, aka, the demigod of men within society, but now I'm just naming the betabux/alphafux dynamic that women seem to chase and is non-existant, because very very few men have found this equilibrium where they can be attractive without being abusive.

A woman wants a mascular man, with norms, values and principles he stands by, is well-respected by his peers and environment, has a stable job because of the former and knows what he wants and keeps it as soon as he gets it. He knows how to handle women in bed dominantly without "raping" her, because he recognizes when a woman is attracted and just wants it by the look in her eyes.

The more you think about it, the more it seems that the majority of men who end up in these rape cases are just a bunch of social morons who can't read women at all, because they haven't dealt with them to an extent to be ever capable of understanding them the slightest.

Title	The War Bride Argument
Author	Skuggasveinn
Upvotes	50
Comments	60
Date	July 4, 2018 6:43 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/8w3yvk/the_war_bride_argument/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/the-war-bride-argument.51228 https://theredarchive.com/post/51228

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