Tips on how to get through a rough mindset / mood patch

kukul · 2014-01-10T18:20:55+00:00

You are not your past, your embarassing experiences, letdowns and wasted opportunities.
You are not your subpar job or college, lousy friends and nagging family.
You are not what some vapid hottie deems you to be worth.

You are a body and a mind, both of which can be trained to a degree of excellence you can't even fathom and, unlike countless masses, you have a goal and will to reach for more than just mediocre existence of a pushover. Don't you?

Focus on the goal and keep your will strong.

christiefrontdrive · 2014-01-10T19:03:29+00:00

I have motivation problems as well, though less and less frequently the more I read this sub. The best advice I can give is that all men need to understand that the only person they can truly count on is themselves. You have to look out for yourself, like I have to look out for myself. It sounds like something you'd see in a superhero cartoon for children on Saturday morning, but it's something that never even crossed my mind until my early 20s. You have to take care of yourself, because no one else can (or should). You exist on your own plane. Personal stories are generally better than copypasta'd quotes so here's a quick one:

The most crucial point of motivation for me is one I've only discovered in the last couple of months: you have to force yourself to change your ways or it just won't happen. You can't wait for a perfect day. Drag yourself kicking and screaming into whatever changes you need to make, because it's too easy to slip back into shitty habits. Too easy to be content.

For me personally, I think no motivation is bad motivation to begin your change, although some RPers might disagree. You should change to better you, and your focus should be on bettering yourself long-term. But if you're just awakening in life and you're an angry, bitter fuck like I am, I feel that whatever motivation you have is a-okay if it means you get off your ass. We all know a guy who was picked on in elementary school and spent all summer before high school lifting weights and no one fucked with him again: we can argue all day whether the motivation for a change like that is cheapened if the guy wasn't thinking "I'm going to better myself" but was instead thinking "I'll show those fucking pricks", but the results are the same. Again, no motivation is bad motivation to begin your change in my opinion: whether you're fueled by an innocent want of self-improvement or with every rep you lift you're daydreaming about curb-stomping everyone who ever hurt you, whatever gets you off your ass and started is legitimate. Just be sure to remember that the end goal is to improve yourself, for yourself. Don't be the guy with a chip on his shoulder because he was fat or a loser or whatever else he was, and he's a cunt for the rest of his life because of it. Once you sort yourself out, however noble or bitter that journey started, a wonderful thing happens: you realize that you are the only person you want to impress. You realize that when you have proven more to yourself than you ever thought you could, you are interested less and less every day in proving anything to anyone else.

This is the mistake I made in my late teens: when I had trouble finding a job, my parents were generally understanding, although never happy if I wasn't working. But they'd help me out, give me a place to sleep, some food, whatever. I felt bitter and angry I couldn't take care of myself, but instead of using that time to ensure it never happened again, I become complacent. I didn't have to buy my own food or pay for a place to sleep, so why should I work? This was my mindset for three or four years, and the cycle repeated itself. I'd find a job that lasted a month, and then be back on the couch. It was all just bearable enough that I could keep going without working. I didn't have the money for the headphones I wanted, but I had some cereal box ear buds that were better than nothing. I was a bit flabby but hey, I wasn't looking for a girlfriend so who cares? This is the kind of backwards thinking I was doing.

The trouble was that life was never so bad that I felt I had to change. It was shitty, but just good enough I coasted instead of working harder and harder. And where did that get me? 22 years old, lazing around in my underwear chain-smoking all day, achieving absolutely sweet fuck all in the real world. Incapable of being happy for anyone else because I wasn't happy with myself. For fuck's sakes, I've been daydreaming for ten fucking years about starting a band and but I've never even played an instrument. Because learning the guitar is hard, and on the rare occasions I actually earned myself $200 for a pawn shop acoustic I'd just go to the licquor store and buy a night's escape from the endless unfulfillment.

From time to time I considered joining the Canadian Forces for no reasons whatsoever other than that I knew in army life I would be forced to change. Forced to get fit and become a capable man. I didn't think I could force myself. I didn't join, because I found ways to force myself. You don't need to have a calling or a grand vision, you just need to know yourself and be true to what you want to be. I've got a list of things I want to accomplish this year taped to the back of my door, along with another paper for my workouts and reading goals, and it fucking kills me to have to write "no" on that sheet of paper if I slip up or get lazy. No one is depending on me. I don't have any kids who will starve if I don't try hard. I just sat around waiting for motivation for years and realized, not too late, but certainly late enough, that it doesn't work that way. My motivation now is avoiding the feeling of utter uselessness I get when I write on my little sheet of paper no one else sees that I was too lazy to fulfill my obligations to myself that day.

So try your best, and don't read this post like a tale of success: I haven't achieved anything yet. But I will, the same as everyone else who has finally, finally had enough of it and decided to change even if it kills them. A good plan today is always better than a perfect plan tomorrow.

afcpoop · 2014-01-10T18:48:07+00:00

I was an in and out of depression guy, I still am from time to time. But it really boils down to 2 things.

YOUR DIET and YOUR WILLPOWER.

YOUR DIET: Too much acidic food will turn you into an anxiety factory. When you start feeling fucked up, you should get some alkaline foods in your body. Wheatgrass and barley juice helps a lot with this. ALSO vitimin B, and D3 are god tier for the good feeling stuff you need. This will destroy all the depression " feelings". It's TOTALLY RELATED TO WHAT YOU PUT IN YOUR BODY.

YOUR WILLPOWER: It fucking sucks I know, but once you get the shitty feelings out by using the dietary tips I gave, you need to fucking SNAP OUT OF IT. It's like trying to wake up from a nightmare. You just gotta flex that muscle and be like STOP BEING DEPRESSED. All this feel good bullshit won't help you. It's literally your pussy little ass finding comfort in these feelings. Just fucking stop. Easier said than done, but it's what you gotta do. It's about mentally being strong. If you got the physical stuff out of the way (using the diet tips I shared) than the mind thing stuff is just training. Just be strong and pull through it.

SneakyTouchy · 2014-01-10T19:28:00+00:00

I had to muster up a ton of strength to eventually get myself to the gym on a daily basis, but it helps a lot. A daily morning dose of eggs, endorphins, vitamin b and d will change your mentality such that you won't need nearly as much willpower to keep going. I think it has something to do with becoming addicted to the endorphins.

More protein and stop fapping! Stop your orgasms for a few weeks. Your testosterone and tapas will grow out of control! Go to /r/nofap for more info.

I get my daily dose of Vitamin B from those little Mio things. For D I've been going in tanning beds and hitting the pool on Sundays, but you can get supplements for that as well. If you hit the beds though, use a lot of lotion.

For social situations, I pound about 2g of taurine to help myself stay focused on the moment. It does wonders for my social anxieties.

Pick up some books for your spare time. I'm reading "48 laws of power" and the "book of pook" right now. It will give you a lot of distraction away from self destructive thoughts.

These are just suggestions to get the ball rolling so you can start putting TRP to practice.

slcjosh · 2014-01-10T20:05:48+00:00

do more shit.

I hit a rough spot a few months ago. I was struggling to stay motivated to work out, i was in a dead end job yet seeking a new one like a fiend seeks a needle, and i had been reduced from 3 plates to 1 that i was barely hanging onto with my finger nails.

I picked up a new hobby, joined an indoor soccer league with a homie of mine. Mind you i have not played soccer for like, 8 years. fuck it.

Despite struggling my first few games to get my touch back, improving constantly and impacting the outcome of the game was therapeutic in a sense. My game was improving, my conditioning, and i was having shit loads of fun.

I then talked my friend into letting me join his coed team that plays a different night of the week. I used this as additional practice time to work on my skillset (the competition is far inferior, so i can try to get away with more and get better) not too mention its a gold mine for meeting new women. Fit women who enjoy sports.

Its all about how you apply yourself in my opinion. If you hit a rut, find something you have ignored a bit, and throw your effort back at it. Or find something new that interests you and go crush it.

2014-01-10T22:27:41+00:00

Anxiety serves a signaling function in a healthy person. It's telling you to get moving on what you know you need to do. The only antidote to what you're feeling is activity.

MetacognitiveMan · 2014-01-10T19:56:29+00:00

Start a daily journal.

Write down your self-doubts and listing beliefs. Recognize them for what they are.

fidinmabelly · 2014-01-10T19:29:53+00:00

Mind over matter. Always strive for greatness in everything you do, always look forward - never back and have achievable goals to work towards. Keeps me happy.

mrpoopistan · 2014-01-11T00:16:58+00:00

I work out more.

I've found when everything starts killing me, the easiest solution is to run. I have a great country trail that goes 15 miles near my house. You go out in ice and snow and shit, and all you can do is focus on running because if you don't you'll break your ankle.

That's what works for me, anyhow.

gwankovera · 2014-01-11T06:46:47+00:00

I notice a lot of times depression (if it is not caused by a side effect of a drug) is your body and minds way of saying the situation you are in is not something you should be in so find your way out. So you have almost no motivation, focus on what little you have and push on it. add a little more to it and keep building on what you have, your beliefs do make you who you are, so it would also be a good idea to examine your beliefs and see what ones you truly believe and what ones you just picked up but don't like. then work on dropping the latter. focus on what makes you happy and again build up from there. And also if need by reach out to someone, not as if for help but i found when i have had one or two bouts of depression reaching out to my friends and hanging out helped my pull up and reorient myself in the direction I wanted to go at the time.

Wowrllyscrub · 2014-01-11T05:30:58+00:00

When im sad i stop being sad and be awesome instead- NPH

This mindset is all you need

RedPillScare · 2014-01-11T06:38:08+00:00

Also, put a pencil in your mouth crossways and bite on it. It forces your mouth into the imitation of a smile. The biofeedback of this forces your brain into a happier mood.

emptyform · 2014-01-10T23:19:33+00:00

You keep going. Whether you just failed hard at something or crushed it, there's no other option but to keep going. Whatever it is, keep going. Do something different that's productive if you're stuck on one thing. Trudge ahead. Keep going. Men don't give up.

Title	Tips on how to get through a rough mindset / mood patch
Author	The_BitterTruth
Upvotes	26
Comments	25
Date	January 10, 2014 5:52 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1uw97s/tips_on_how_to_get_through_a_rough_mindset_mood/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/tips-on-how-to-get-through-a-rough-mindset-mood.9840 https://theredarchive.com/post/9840

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