My ex reached out to me a few days ago about wanting to talk after I blocked him. He has some HVM qualities. Some, like he always wanted me to talk about what was bothering me and then he would talk. But he would never change. And one of the really big things is that I don’t have a good relationship with my mom. She’s hurt me emotionally a lot and he once compared me to my mom when I wasn’t treating him so well. I apologized and owned up to my mistake and told him never to compare me to my mom since he’s never met my mom.

He said he knows my mom isn’t good and hurts me and he won’t say it again. Low and behold he said it a few times when I was telling him how he hurt me. He told me “ I can’t hurt him then tell him not to express how he feels about it”. apparently telling him not to compare me to my mom when he’s never met her is restricting his ability to express himself. And I actually changed!